Is my wife bisexual?
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Old 11-22-2010, 04:52 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Default Is my wife bisexual?

Okay first of all my wife and I have a very open relationship. We love each other very much and I know of her attraction to women and it is a non-issue between the two of us. But, I'm just a little confused (and not that it matters really). But I have point blank asked her if she was bisexual before and she said no, that she was definitely straight. Now I know for a fact that she is attracted to men as well. But it just doesn't seem to make any sense that she wouldn't say she is bisexual. She loves and actually prefers lesbian porn. She has had lesbian "experiences" in high school. Even specifically telling me that she always wanted to have sex with one particular girl in high school. (Which honestly is a turn on for me and does not cause me to feel insecure in any way).

It just seems to me that it is obvious she is bisexual, but she won't just admit it to me. Any clues as to why this might be? I just want her to feel comfortable in her own skin and not have to be afraid to tell me the honest truth because of the connotations that surround someone being bisexual.
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Old 11-22-2010, 05:00 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Default Re: Is my wife bisexual?

Maybe she is just not comfortable being labeled as bisexual. A lot of people grow up thinking that it is wrong to be gay or bisexual, and that can be a hard way of thinking to beat. Or maybe she just isn't sure. I kind of find myself in that position. I have never been with a woman. I am currently married to a man, and have been for 10 years. But I like watching lesbian porn, find women attractive, etc. I do fantasize about being with other women, but doubt that I ever will. I am not sure whether to call myself bisexual or not. I guess some of us are just confused!
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Old 11-22-2010, 05:02 PM   #3 (permalink)
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Default Re: Is my wife bisexual?

She might not want to admit it because she's been taught it's wrong, or she might be afraid of other's reactions. Or she might truly not be bisexual. There are women who can appreciate the beauty of a woman's body without being bisexual. Having experiences and wanting to sleep with one particular girl could be bicurious rather than bisexual.

I wouldn't keep forcing the issue; it's only going to make her more resistant to admit anything. If/when she decides she's ready to admit something, she'll come to you.
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Old 11-22-2010, 05:05 PM   #4 (permalink)
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Default Re: Is my wife bisexual?

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Originally Posted by atruckersgirl View Post
She might not want to admit it because she's been taught it's wrong, or she might be afraid of other's reactions. Or she might truly not be bisexual. There are women who can appreciate the beauty of a woman's body without being bisexual. Having experiences and wanting to sleep with one particular girl could be bicurious rather than bisexual.

I wouldn't keep forcing the issue; it's only going to make her more resistant to admit anything. If/when she decides she's ready to admit something, she'll come to you.
Yeah I actually don't really every talk to her about it or push the subject, this was just one instance in particular when we talked about it. I just more or less don't want her to live under a mask. But I agree, I will NOT in anyway push the subject and will wait on her to bring it up, if ever.
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Old 11-22-2010, 10:22 PM   #5 (permalink)
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Default Re: Is my wife bisexual?

I agree. She might be worried about your reaction, for one thing. Your lucky to have such a cool wife
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Old 11-23-2010, 08:32 AM   #6 (permalink)
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Default Re: Is my wife bisexual?

You may be cool with it, but are you as accepting about gay men? The reason I ask is that if you make a passing comment that some guy is a "fag" or speak disparagingly about people pushing for gay marriage, you send a message to your wife that contradicts what you are saying here.

That along with how she was brought up or her thinking that any sexual interest outside of you would hurt you probably keeps it inside.
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