11-30-2010, 09:39 PM
Join Date: Dec 2009
| | In love with 2 men - so confused!
It has been over 8 months since I have had something to talk about that really requires some advice.
About a year ago my husband dropped a bomb shell on me and told me he was no longer happy in our marriage, that he felt we were becoming codependent, and that he wasnt happy with the way his life was going.
We went through about 6 months of marriage counselling and started getting our relationship back on track. Throughout this time he treated me like rubbish. He made very little effort and started behaving really badly towards me. Now 6 months down the track, things are really back on track, however I always question in my mind what if he turned around and did this again?!
The main focus of our counselling was our communication (or lack their of), which has definitely improved but still has a long way to go. We have started talking about kids again, and this time around it is freaking me out! I am in a new job, surrounded by alot of amazing people, and I am really starting to realise the stress that having children can place on a marriage (especially if the relationship has been known to be rocky). There are so many things I feel that he/we need to change before that can happen but he doesnt seem to see that.
Anyway, in the last few months, I have met someone at work that started as a friendship and has now progessed to us admitting we have very strong feelings for each other. I have not cheated on my husband (well physically anyway) and I never will. But even this emotional affair is killing me. I feel awful about it but I dont know what to do.
Part of me thinks that if everything that happened with my husband over the last 12 months hadnt have happened, then I wouldnt have allowed this to enter my life, the other part thinks that if I was entirely happy I wouldnt be entertaining the idea of being with this other man. However he makes me feel a way that no one has ever made me feel (not even my husband in the early stages). We have so much more in common and love doing so much of the same things.
Does anyone have any advice?
Thank you in advance