Well its done

stumped · 08-13-2008, 11:46 AM

After lots of advice on which direction to head and what to do I decided to just talk to him and this is what I said in a nutshell.

I told him I just wanted him to listen and that I felt 10 years was worth a second shot of 6 months trying to make things better..that we both could improve our relationship if we communicated with each other what the other needs. That we couldnt predict the future so we couldnt say if 6 months would or wouldnt make a difference. I told him to think about it (he was going away for the weekend) and we could talk about it when he got home.

Well he got home on Sunday and Monday he decided to finally call him Mom...so I felt I had my answer. That night we talked and he told me he was done.

So we are going to co-exist for now until the house sells...we are still friends (he really is my best friend) but I am living my life. We talked for a long time we both cried...I know that he cares about me and he never meant to hurt me but sometimes things just arent meant to be so we will both be fine. And actually I am OK with it....I feel better now than I have since this started because I KNOW that I DID everything I could possibly do!

So on to new and exciting things =)

MarkTwain · 08-13-2008, 12:25 PM

Good luck

You never said how his birthday went...

stumped · 08-13-2008, 12:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MarkTwain

Good luck

You never said how his birthday went...

Oh sorry lol

There was no "action" so to speak....I didn't feel it was the right thing to do.

draconis · 08-13-2008, 12:51 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by stumped

After lots of advice on which direction to head and what to do I decided to just talk to him and this is what I said in a nutshell.

I told him I just wanted him to listen and that I felt 10 years was worth a second shot of 6 months trying to make things better..that we both could improve our relationship if we communicated with each other what the other needs. That we couldnt predict the future so we couldnt say if 6 months would or wouldnt make a difference. I told him to think about it (he was going away for the weekend) and we could talk about it when he got home.

Well he got home on Sunday and Monday he decided to finally call him Mom...so I felt I had my answer. That night we talked and he told me he was done.

So we are going to co-exist for now until the house sells...we are still friends (he really is my best friend) but I am living my life. We talked for a long time we both cried...I know that he cares about me and he never meant to hurt me but sometimes things just arent meant to be so we will both be fine. And actually I am OK with it....I feel better now than I have since this started because I KNOW that I DID everything I could possibly do!

So on to new and exciting things =)

Atleast now you can move forward with your life. Good to hear that you are no longer in limbo and that you gave it your all and remained friends.

draconis

MarkTwain · 08-13-2008, 01:01 PM

Well sometimes it's right to move on. It sure feels empty if there is not someone special you are moving in with. I really wish you well in your new endeavour, and hope you will keep up the weight loss and the exercise

stumped · 08-13-2008, 02:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MarkTwain

Well sometimes it's right to move on. It sure feels empty if there is not someone special you are moving in with. I really wish you well in your new endeavour, and hope you will keep up the weight loss and the exercise

Oh I definatley will keep up with the weight loss....I get on the scale every day as a reminder to make sure it doesnt go the wrong way!

stumped · 08-13-2008, 02:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by draconis

Atleast now you can move forward with your life. Good to hear that you are no longer in limbo and that you gave it your all and remained friends.

draconis

Yeah Im good with it. My friends cant believe how well I am handling everything but you know when it all comes down to it he has every right to be happy just as much as me and sometimes the same people dont make each other happy.

A friend did give me a cute line that helps a little to.....

"The grass is always greener by the septic tank"

It made me laugh!

Amplexor · 08-13-2008, 02:37 PM

I hate to hear when any marriage fails but you’ve done all you could to salvage it. Tough days are in your immediate future but brighter ones are just beyond those. Good luck.

MarkTwain · 08-13-2008, 02:56 PM

stumped-
I can just tell you are a quality person, you will soon be inundated with offers. Just tell 'em to wait in line

draconis · 08-13-2008, 03:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by stumped

Yeah Im good with it. My friends cant believe how well I am handling everything but you know when it all comes down to it he has every right to be happy just as much as me and sometimes the same people dont make each other happy.

A friend did give me a cute line that helps a little to.....

"The grass is always greener by the septic tank"

It made me laugh!

well it is true about the septic tank, but that is funny and I have to remember it.

draconis

stumped · 08-13-2008, 03:51 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MarkTwain

stumped-
I can just tell you are a quality person, you will soon be inundated with offers. Just tell 'em to wait in line

I dont know about all that but thanks

stumped · 08-13-2008, 03:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by draconis

well it is true about the septic tank, but that is funny and I have to remember it.

draconis

Yeah it makes me laugh!

Thanks everyone for all your help and support

swedish · 08-13-2008, 05:49 PM

Hi Stumped,

I'm sorry to hear this news but I'm glad you are keeping your spirits up and on to new and exciting things...I think MarkTwain may be on to something