5 Languages of Love

Jaded Heart · 02-10-2011, 09:50 AM

I have been reading this book now for a week. I love the acsept of it and have learned a lot.

What I don't know is how can I even begin to know my H love language if he won't do the little quiz.

I sent him the link in face book private message and he looked at the quiz and closed it. I really wish he would take it, I already do acts of service for him. I always talk him up , make him feel good. I buy him gifts all the time. I have no clue what it is.

How do you get them to take the quiz

827Aug · 02-10-2011, 10:06 AM

You can usually answer the quiz for him. Generally in a long term marriage you know how that person will answer. Or on a particular question you might ask it in a general conversation. At least that's how I approached that obstacle when my estranged husband refused to participate.

Blanca · 02-10-2011, 06:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jaded Heart

How do you get them to take the quiz

you dont. you respect their boundaries first and foremost. instead it might help to understand why he doesnt want to take it.

Powerbane · 02-10-2011, 06:58 PM

My wife was the same way - this was after she said she was leaving and I was grasping at straws to prevent it. To this day she has not.

The way I got around it was actively listening and observing different things over the course of a few weeks. We eventually got to a point where I was experimenting and doing certain things in a certain love language - took a while but I pretty much nailed them.

We're just now to the point where I told her about the love languages and then asked her what she thought mine were. She nailed mine too - this led to a whole discussion about hers. She made me guess, but from my observations and actively listening - I was dead on!

So it's not impossible to do this alone.

rome2012 · 02-10-2011, 11:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 827Aug

You can usually answer the quiz for him. Generally in a long term marriage you know how that person will answer. Or on a particular question you might ask it in a general conversation. At least that's how I approached that obstacle when my estranged husband refused to participate.

I agree.....

Even though my marriage failed I am 100% sure what his love languages are....

We've been together for almost 11 years and if I had known about the book I am certain the finality of our marriage could have been avoided

.....

Powerbane has a great suggestion.....just try it out....

Good luck !!!!!!

credamdóchasgra · 02-11-2011, 11:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Powerbane

My wife was the same way - this was after she said she was leaving and I was grasping at straws to prevent it. To this day she has not.

The way I got around it was actively listening and observing different things over the course of a few weeks. We eventually got to a point where I was experimenting and doing certain things in a certain love language - took a while but I pretty much nailed them.

We're just now to the point where I told her about the love languages and then asked her what she thought mine were. She nailed mine too - this led to a whole discussion about hers. She made me guess, but from my observations and actively listening - I was dead on!

So it's not impossible to do this alone.

That sounds kind of fun.

I think I may need to experiment that way with my H, even though I think I could guess his...
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