Stone_Dagger

If you ask your Wife/Husband:

"Do you Think your a Good Woman/Man?"
-or-
"Do you think your a Good Wife/Husband?"

Should that warrant an immediate answer or do you feel that question deserves them the time to "Think" about it?

surfergirl

For me the answer is right there but I guess that doesn't mean it's the same for everyone. I live deliberately so I'm constantly making choices and decisions about who I am.

woodstock

Depends on if the asker is looking for a yes or no, or more in depth discussion as to why. Best bet is if the other asks, smile, say "Of course you are" then run!!!!! LMAO

Not a good question at all HAHA

Stone_Dagger

I agree with you SurferGirl.
&
i say why not ask? Also i mean in detail for an answer..Not a Yes or No.


I asked my wife this once and she shrugged her shoulders and couldn't give me a direct answer...then she asked me and i splurged so much on the answer YES and reason why she couldn't even debate anything i said.

Needless to say she had an affair....So i guess the guilt put a halt to a direct answer.

LonelyNLost

I think tone here is really important. As well as context. Was it during an argument? Because then they might need time to think about it. But if it was just a general question, I would think that most people could come up with what they think they do right and then acknowledge what they could improve on.

As a woman, I could say "Yes, but I could do ____ better."

__________________
~ You may be deceived if you trust too much, but you will live in torment if you don't trust enough. ~

Or, you could be a big sap and trust your husband, and he could end up being a lying, spineless, cheater.

Stone_Dagger

For myself as a Man.
That answer alone as a response would be Golden.

woodstock

I would likely be more specific such as "Do you think you are a good protector? if yes, Why?"

Do you think you are an assertive or a submissive person?

Do you think you are a good listener, good supporter?

Do you really think I have never faked it? Really? DAMN I should move to hollywood, I gots me some MAD acting chops!

Wait... that's not what you were talking about with "good man" was it

major misfit

If my SO thought about either answer, I would want to explore the "why" further. I would think his answer would be an immediate (an immediate yes, btw)..but that's how *I* see him, maybe not necessarily how he sees himself.

__________________
The first time someone shows you who they are, believe them. ***Maya Angelou

"But it's only on the brink that people find the will to change. Only at the precipice do we evolve" ***Professor Barnhardt to Klaatu

Deejo

It's a loaded question, and greatly depends upon the context, tone, and setting of the asking.

__________________
"I figured out they were serious eventually but was thinking it was ridiculous. I wanted to kick them in the balls." - Trenton

4sure

Immediate. One knows if they are doing right or wrong in the marriage.

sinnister

I agree with Deejo. There's no right or wrong on that one.

Stone_Dagger

Totally Agree!

Stone_Dagger

AGREED! One does Know!

michael8

Deejo says it's a loaded question and I totally agree! If I was asked such a question I would think about why it was being asked, what I did to prompt the question, and what exactly would make me a good man. I am confident that I am a good man, but I could always use some time to ponder things that aren't explicitly asked in the question.

sunshine31

Sounds like a potential setup. Any reaction besides no hesitation, a big smile and a resounding "of course!" could lead to hurt feelings. Regardless of how I was truly feeling I would want to reassure my spouse and make them feel good, but I would also want to take the opportunity to inform them of areas which need improvement. So like I said, i think hesitation in deciding which road you want to go down could cause problems all over the place.
if you ask your spouse, "do you think i'm fat", you KNOW what you want them to say!