Jamison

What do you think it means if your spouse or SO were to ask you about bringing in a third party into your sex life? Or even having a open relationship? Does it mean they are not satisfied with just you?

And what if you asked them if you were enough for them and if they weren't satisfied with you, for them to say, yes you are enough for them and that they are satisfied. I mean come on, how many people are actually going to say, you're just not enough for me, you don't satisfy me completely lets bring another into the mix?

So if there are those out there in an open relationship, did you bring it up or did your partner? If they brought it up, surely they didn't say it was because you weren't enough for them? Is it possible you're not, and they wont tell you that, so they gave you another excuse hoping you would go along with what they wanted?

CallaLily

Hard to say for sure what they really mean by it when they say that. However, I would think there are some who do imply their spouse isn't good enough or they don't fully satisfy them and I would think they wouldn't tell them that if it were the case. I'm sure some do lie about their reason(s)

All I know is, if it were me and I was asked that, REGARDLESS of what they may or not mean by it, I would need to rethink why I'm with them and the relationship as a whole. People have to do what works for them, and for me it wouldn't work because I'm not into that. So if my partner was and I wasn't, its probably not going to work. If you have two people on the same page about it, then fine.

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michzz

In my case my wife wanted a divorce after making bizarre accusations and when I refused to consider it without trying to fix things in marriage counseling, she said she wanted an open marriage. When I responded SARCASTICALLY that sure, that would be ok, she actually had the audacity to act like she had permission when we went to the counselor.

She was cheating already from the gitgo.

I would presume it now, knowing what I know from hard, painful life experience.

CallaLily

Oh my! I'm sorry that happened. In your opinion do you think there are many who might already be cheating and thats why they ask their partner for a open marriage? In their eyes it might make it seem things are ok as along as people get to have sex with whoever?

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michzz

It's a total manipulation to make it seems like they got permission or to have somewhere else to jump if their outrageous behavior is discovered.

I really hate what I went through.

Damage beyond toxic.