What can I do on our 10 year wedding anniversary for me and my wife? - Talk About Marriage
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post #1 of 8 (permalink) Old 04-07-2011, 02:22 PM Thread Starter
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What can I do on our 10 year wedding anniversary for me and my wife?

We have been married for 10 years this September. I love my wife very much and although I have been faithful and a very providing man, I know I have lacked in the affection, emotional, loving area. She was involved in an Emotional Affair recently and we have talked about it only after I had my proof. Anyways, although it hard for me to deal with, I want to do what I can to save our marriage. We have kids involved in which I love dearly as well. Any advice for our 10 year anniversary? I have several ideas as well.
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post #2 of 8 (permalink) Old 04-07-2011, 03:03 PM
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Re: What can I do on our 10 year wedding anniversary for me and my wife?

Go away on a weekend trip somewhere, just the two of you? Maybe a second honeymoon (same location) if you can?

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post #3 of 8 (permalink) Old 04-07-2011, 03:06 PM
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post #4 of 8 (permalink) Old 04-07-2011, 03:20 PM
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Re: What can I do on our 10 year wedding anniversary for me and my wife?

Porn stars, booze, and Tiger's Blood? oh wait, that's already been done.
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post #5 of 8 (permalink) Old 04-07-2011, 09:05 PM
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Re: What can I do on our 10 year wedding anniversary for me and my wife?

Definitely get away for the weekend. Make it a big deal if you want, but don't let it be a stressful thing (no complicated logistics, or so expensive it stresses you). Ten years is a long time--easy to gradually develop emotional distance (maybe reason for her EA?) The best way to help that is relaxed one-on-one time with plenty of opportunity for quiet conversation and no distractions.

If you're not the assertive type, she'll probably appreciate you making the arrangements yourself for a change (good chance to surprise her). If you are the assertive type, maybe it'd be nicer if you let her control the arrangements.
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post #6 of 8 (permalink) Old 04-07-2011, 09:39 PM
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Re: What can I do on our 10 year wedding anniversary for me and my wife?

Star paying attention to her. Notice what she likes, what she doesn't, buy things she likes to eat, and other small things you have noticed her talking about. Like a movie she wants to see or her favourite movie of all time and watch it with her.(My fiance does this and it makes me feel very loved by him.) Do this before the anniversary and continue to do it. Notice when she puts an effort in to look nice and admire her.

For the anniversary, I agree about taking her away somewhere.
Book somewhere she would like to go, do not consult her, do not tell her about it. Organize with her work for her to have the time off (if she works), you call them tell them you are organizing a surprise, they will be so happy and thinks it's so sweet, her work won't mind.

You call and organize people to look after the children, again they will find it so sweet that you are doing this , they won't say no.

Then the night before tell her to pack for that you are going away in the morning and not to ask questions. Let her know that you have it all worked out.

She will be thrilled that you organized it all on your own and took care of everything. While you are away focus on spending the time doing lots of lovely things together.
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post #7 of 8 (permalink) Old 04-07-2011, 10:29 PM
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Re: What can I do on our 10 year wedding anniversary for me and my wife?

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post #8 of 8 (permalink) Old 04-10-2011, 08:32 AM
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Re: What can I do on our 10 year wedding anniversary for me and my wife?

How about recreating the circumstances of how you guys met? Of those proverbial first days together?

I am thinking let's say you guys met in NYC. But you can't go there for the anniversary. So go for dinner to a NYC themed restaurant. Let's say the day you met you had strawberry frappuccino from Starbucks. So while on a stroll together, get that frappuccino.

A few days before the anniversary, leave around a picture of you two together from that time, for her to "find", if you have some of those. Leave around things for her to "find" that would put her in that "state of mind", from the beginning.

If you must say yes, say it with an open heart. If you must say no, say it without fear. - Paulo Coelho
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