FINISH LAST

been married to my wife for 23 years now but we were high school sweethearts and probably been together longer than that. Shortly after our anniversary she has done a 360. She leaves for work at 0900 and I don't see or hear from her at all anymore until the hours of midnight to 0400 in the morning every night now.

I have been the sole provider for everything, mortgage,credit card bills, gas/electric, all medical bills,car note, insurances etc. Actually the money she make she is hers,she can contribute if necessary but usually not.
I buy her a new vehicle every 3 years, the past 20 years bring her breakfast every sunday in bed while I am up cooking for the family.

I have 2 jobs and told myself if I was ever blessed with making great money I would ensure my family had the better things in life, well I spoiled them. The wife and I use to do things together and that has stopped. She has recently asked for a divorce and I am crushed. I thought I had given her eveything,quality time together, spirtiual time together,a home and all of the things you might want. It isn't hard to see that she is having an affair all the signs are in front of me.

My questions are why is she still coming home and hopping in the bed after asking for this divorce. Why is she angry at me but she is the one cheating, Why does it seem that the good guy finishes last? I feel like I was just there as a good home provider and to have poured all my heart into this woman and get jilted like this after all these years, was she always planning this?

Rob774

I'll copy and paste for the most part of how i answered you in the other thread...
To me, it seems as though you were taken for granted. THe more you did... the more she got used to you giving. There was never a time when she had to take a step back and appreciate what you have, what you've provided for her. The Great Provider, the Mr. Nice Guy, to her = The Guy With No Edge, No Passion. Chances are, the guy she is cheating on you with, is 1/5 the man you are, but he's got that moxy, that mojo, that edge that you don't have, that extra bit of "umph" that excites your wife. She will have to learn the hard way, like everyone else who goes down this road... there's a special little ***** and her name is Karma. And also the grass is not always greener on the other side. She wants to cheat, she can call another household home. You are not going to sleep in the bed i provided why you bang other dudes.

Conrad

FL,

You probably already know what your problem is:

The Man Up and Nice Guy Reference

We're here to help in the Men's Clubhouse.

Read all the links. It will help you focus your mind.

__________________
"Forgive or Re-Live"

-AFEH

luckyman

My advice is to get out. After such betrayal, it is doubtful that you will ever be able to recover your trust in her, even if she begs to have you back. The memory of the betrayal never goes away.

Jellybeans

Timei for her to sleep in another room.

She doesn't get to cuddle with you while she hands you the divorce w/ her other hand.

Get tested for STDs.