Hello, I have been married for 19 years
and I am very very sad, mad and stressed almost every day, why? because I feel like I am wasteing the best part of life. I knew that my husband was introverted when I married him, I knew that he was'nt outgoing and talkative the way I am, but dam...I NEVER thought that when it came to communicating with me about our marriage and about things that married couples talked bout was included, I didnt realize that along with being INTROVERTED came complete silence towards me, non communication in the bedroom, NO sex for 6 years...WHY? because I was the one making all the moves, setting the evening, you know wanting to be sexy, fixing a glass of wine, but dam..I want to know that he wants me to, I want to be seduced also, I want him to make a move on me, but well....I have been waiting since I stopped making the move on him 6 years ago, and this fool hasnt said a word, made a move, of missed a step, he hasnt even mention sex, thought and I have asked him, why havent you even tried to make love to me, why havent you even mentioned anything about our marriage. all he dose is just stare at me, and i actually have to say to him..( ahh thats a question) because he just looks at me as though he is trying to think of an answer..and he probally is, hell i dont know...finally he will say,...well its because your always asking me, and were always fighting about it, and my reply is...what do you expect me to do and say...NOthing? its been 5 yeeeeaaarrrsss..and you havent said a word...he finally admitted that he was masturbating...and I asked him why? I dont even look my age, I am a 5'3 126lbs shoulder length red hair, love to exercise, nice round booty, beautiful white teeth, medium full lips, intelligent women, i dont smoke, i dont drink, my home is beautiful, its clean, I work, i go to church, i dont insist that he goes with me, i'm an excellent cook, I dont cook except holidays, we both watch our wait, I 'm a sexy woman, a younger tina turner lookakile, but this man treats me and takes me completly fopr granted, and he will not tell me why.... he says its because I am aguring with him about how he treats me, and I tell him, what do you think Im suppose to to ..just except you treating me like a picture on a wall...ou dont even look at me, he never touches me, he never compliments me, he dosent say a word to me, you no things a husband tells his wife, no matter what or how much I complain he closes down completly, he sits in another room, falls asleep, and then gets up and go to work. I am a saved christian, I dont want to have an affair, I am so unhappy, I dont think I love him anymore, I want to love him, I want my marriage, but soo much has been left unsaid, he dosent have any feelings or emotions about anything I say to him, he tells me that he hold on to anger, and that he dosent know how to fix arguments, he refuses to say anything, he answers me by saying( Well if you say thats what I am then I am)...he wont except responsibility for his actions. example...I came home oneday and the electric was off, I called him and asked him ? Is the electric bill paid>? Its suppose to be he stated...I said well the garage door isnt going up, you need to call and see whats up? he said well it shouldnt be off, and I said have you paid it, he says...NO,,I didint think it was due till tomorrow, I asked him had he even cecked the due date...No..electric was off, I was very angry because my husband knew this, but he wont tell me anything..I never know when and if he is tell me everthing I need to know when it comes to the bills, or anything..because when he talks to me, he will only tell me half of something, and when he does, later on he will tell me well thats not what I meant, this is how my life is, its a cross to bare...a heavy one and I know we all have them..I know that the only person can change him is GOD..he is not saved, I dont even know if he is really baptised, his mother or father took him to church, he went with friends, and he said that they all got baptised, but I know that your parents have to be at the church or they should be when a child gets baptised, in my spirit I just dont know if he is being truthful, and I dont know why.. I just feel like there are things about him in all these years that I really dont know..What I do remind myself is that its not just me that he treats thins way, its his daughter and only grand child , if they dont call him, they will never hear from him, his friends have to call him, his mother gace him away for his gdmom to raise him, he went to live with his mother at the age of 10-12 years old, i wonder if he was hurt by this change, and put up a wall, he hated his step father,,because he tried to raise him the right way, to be respectable, and to be responsible, and my husband hates to be told to do any thing...My husband works nights he is gone all night and he dosent want to ever call me, except every now and then, i,m home by myself, and I tell him to call to make sure i,m ok, thats like talking to the tv.To sum it all up. we have nothing in common, we do nothing together, we sleep in the same bed and our feet never touch and this year 2014 is six years since we have been intimately together..So please pray for our marriage, I have nothing left. thank you.