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post #136 of 484 (permalink) Old 02-05-2015, 10:44 AM Thread Starter
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Re: I asked him to move out.

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Originally Posted by 3Xnocharm View Post
A start for WHAT, exactly? I'm confused...what are you picking him up for, to move his stuff out of your house? Pretty nervey of him to ask you to drive 4.5 hrs!
Not the (ex) BF, my troubled teenage adopted son. Because I didn't have enough stress in my life. I lose one problem and pick up another all within a week's time. Yay life! LOL!

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post #137 of 484 (permalink) Old 02-05-2015, 10:50 AM
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Re: I asked him to move out.

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Not the (ex) BF, my troubled teenage adopted son. Because I didn't have enough stress in my life. I lose one problem and pick up another all within a week's time. Yay life! LOL!
OH! I got lost there, apparently, LOL!

Life is too short to spend time with people who suck the happiness out of you.


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post #138 of 484 (permalink) Old 02-05-2015, 11:27 AM Thread Starter
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Re: I asked him to move out.

LOL! It's ok. I kinda jumped.

Look, something shiney! Haha.
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post #139 of 484 (permalink) Old 02-06-2015, 01:27 AM
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Re: I asked him to move out.

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I"m going to pick him up Sunday. We are starting out well.....he asked me if I could pick him up at his girlfriends house and then swing back by and pick up his stuff (he lives 4.5 hours away.) I responded with a definite NO. You and your stuff need to be at a central location. I will not drive all over kingdom come to accomodate you. (I used to do these things for him when he lived with me before.) I expected the same teenage backlash I always got, but he said, "Ok mama. Love you."

It's a start.
Good, stay strong and keep it this way. You deserve better!!!! My ex had an affair and once I knew about it he was quite open with it. He told me he loved me, asked me to wait for him, said the affair was going down-hill, asked me if I thought a person could be in love with two people at the same time, asked me to lunch one day to talk. He was trying to be sweet but he wasn't willing to give up the girlfriend, lied his way thru counseling and as much as I wanted my husband with his two children and back with me, I knew his heart wasn't with me and I could never trust this man again. Keep walking GA Heart!!!!! It is a process, you can do this!
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post #140 of 484 (permalink) Old 02-07-2015, 12:57 PM Thread Starter
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Re: I asked him to move out.



He stopped by to get his tax documents. I tried to keep it on the front porch, but he wanted to come in and say hi to the boys. In the hour he was here, he hugged me, kissed me, asked to move back in, asked to work it out and NOT move back in, offered to "put a ring on it," asked me to lunch, asked me if I wanted him to rub my feet, and asked me if I wanted to make love.

Finally he left, angry, saying that all the stuff I'm posting on facebook indicates that I am refusing to accept my responsibility in the downfall of our relationship.

I am drained. I prayed a lot. It was hard to not cave and say yes to any of that. But I didn't.
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post #141 of 484 (permalink) Old 02-07-2015, 12:58 PM Thread Starter
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Re: I asked him to move out.

Well, I did kiss him back some.
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post #142 of 484 (permalink) Old 02-07-2015, 01:05 PM
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Re: I asked him to move out.

You're doing GREAT!!!!!!!

You are strong. Stronger than you think. I'd be sorely tempted.

Steer the course.

Your strength is very inspiring.
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post #143 of 484 (permalink) Old 02-07-2015, 01:06 PM
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Re: I asked him to move out.

Draw a boundary and do not cross it. This guy is not interested in making real change but just playing you.

Do you have a male friend that can be around when you have to interact? Another man can really put a damper on Romeo and keep your head a little more clear just with his presence.
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post #144 of 484 (permalink) Old 02-07-2015, 01:18 PM Thread Starter
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Re: I asked him to move out.

No male friends (plenty of stalkers that would LOVE the opportunity...my facebook and phone has been blowing up since he left. Even had a creeper at work ask me out. Really dude, give me a flipping week!) But I think (hope) it will get easier from here. I have to see him again at some point next week to get a title for my car from him. Hopefully we can do it during the week where we have less time.

But I think it's bad that I really WANTED to say yes. Because I'm not gonna lie. I did want to. I wanted to say yes to all of that. I want him to love me like he did at first, like he tried to show today.
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post #145 of 484 (permalink) Old 02-07-2015, 01:21 PM
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Re: I asked him to move out.

The next time he wants to come over, ask him why. If he needs something, set it on the porch and don't bother to open the door. Don't let him in the house again.

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post #146 of 484 (permalink) Old 02-07-2015, 01:22 PM
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Re: I asked him to move out.

This guy should be told, in no uncertain terms, that touching you is off limits!

You also need better male friends. You on the radar of far too many creeps.
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post #147 of 484 (permalink) Old 02-07-2015, 01:27 PM Thread Starter
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Re: I asked him to move out.

I have some good ones, just none close by.

But I wanted him to touch me. Sigh......

I'm doing what I should instead of what I want. (Well, mostly. Kinda.)

I have zero desire to really have much interaction with anyone of the opposite sex right now. All my friends agree with you guys though. Even the people that know us best. My best friend thinks that perhaps we could try again in the future as long as he doens't move in. But I want a life with someone eventually.....
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post #148 of 484 (permalink) Old 02-07-2015, 01:31 PM
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Re: I asked him to move out.

The anger and tantrum are the result of him not being able to manipulate you and not being able to get his gravy train back. You've already seen who he really is.

It's natural for you to be tempted, of course you want him to love you. But he's already shown you he doesn't..... people show who they are when they think there are no consequences. Right now he has every reason to be on good behavior, but if you take a ring and marry this guy he'll figure you're stuck. it'll be much harder to get out of.

Next time don't let him touch you.
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post #149 of 484 (permalink) Old 02-07-2015, 01:36 PM
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Re: I asked him to move out.

Try associating your wants with something negative. You want to be physical with him - picture a bucket of burning coals. You know he's raked you over enough of them.
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post #150 of 484 (permalink) Old 02-07-2015, 02:46 PM
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Re: I asked him to move out.

You are his only option and he's going to continue trying to manipulate you because he knows the hold he has over you.

You need to stop putting yourself in situations where that can happen because he's not going to stop. Why would he. He knows you want him and you are his only hope for getting away from his parents.

This will be going on as long as you let it.
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