She wants me to get a 2nd job or put in more overtime

PBear · 05-06-2011, 07:31 AM

Having 8 weeks off in the summer seems like a luxury to me... Is there something in particular she thinks you two need the money for? Could you split it, so you get 4 weeks to yourself and 4 weeks of extra work? Or work half days?

C

Runs like Dog · 05-06-2011, 08:00 AM

Well first off you need to establish some economic goals. And then create a plan to meet them. If you have 2 kids or 3 then what's the financial toll going to be? For instance I am putting 3 through college right now with no debt to them. They will finish with zero loans and zero credit card debt. But it takes a bit of up front planning to do that.

So figure out what you want to accomplish first.

Catherine602 · 05-06-2011, 08:25 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Halien

I don't think its easy to establish the boundaries without seeing some sort of benefit, though. Too many of us accept that our current spending habits are necessities.

What too many people don't get, however, is that a person can be nudged into a new mindset far easier than being argued into it. By working deliberatly, her new mindset can become a focus on reducing expenses.

I think this is by far the best advice. It changes the conversation from a "you" (husband) to "we" (husband and wife).

turnera · 05-06-2011, 10:17 AM

Worth repeating:

Quote:

Originally Posted by Hicks

She's telling you that financial security is important to her.

Rather than let her dictate to you your working schedule, you should demonstrate to her through words and actions how you are taking care of the family in the financial sense, for both the long and short term.

The other possibility is maybe she wants to stop working? Again, rather than have her dicate how often you work, you should lay out how you want things to work, while making sure her needs for financial securaity are addressed.

turnera · 05-06-2011, 10:19 AM

Have you guys hired a financial planner?

bunnybear · 05-06-2011, 10:22 AM

I find having kids isn't expensive but then because I don't keep keep buying materialistic things for them all the time. Infact, I don't have to as they have lots of clothes and toys at home coz family members always giving them pezzies/money. A lot of moms though do get carried away when they have a baby and they spend a lot on their little one. Maybe she wants you to earn more money to support her spending habits?

turnera · 05-06-2011, 10:37 AM

Yeah, having a baby is just one more way for women to show off.

Runs like Dog · 05-06-2011, 12:12 PM

You gotta have kids. Who else is going to chain you to the toilet and feed you dogfood and steal your Social Security checks when you're old?

magnoliagal · 05-06-2011, 12:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Runs like Dog

You gotta have kids. Who else is going to chain you to the toilet and feed you dogfood and steal your Social Security checks when you're old?

I wish I could laugh and say how funny this is but seeing how my IL's are being treated in their old age...you aren't that far off.

My husband isn't doing it but his sisters sure are.