madimoff

So I'd thought we were well back on track. Silly me.
OH rings from other continent a few hours back, I tell him 9yo & I've had a bit of a falling out (understatement) but we (ie OH & I) have ok small chat and agree to speak later and he to speak to 9yo.
Time goes, son & I make up then literally moments before OH rings all hell breaks loose again, over what I can't begin to describe, definitely trivia, probably denial of permission to use a toy I'd bought him because he'd been good over school work. A rare occurrence. (me buying him a treat) This is relevant later.
OH rings, speaks to 9yo, sounds ok-ish, I speak to OH, he mentions - not the first subject we talk about, though - that this has kicked off just as he's about to go to airport tomorrow (on cruise - on his own). Few sentences pass and he asks why I buy son presents when he treats me this way, I get upset and say because I rarely buy him treats and this was meant to mean something, and (voice cracking by this stage) I say it can't be helped he's just about to go to airport; he accuses me of shouting at him and puts the phone down. I was upset - he doesn't do 'stress' well, particularly where 9yo is concerned, and it often feels like I'm parenting alone half the time(true) but when he's not here I can't vent for fear of 'upsetting' him.
*@#+**
Should be more articulate. I can do it in my head, but not on TAM.
Anyone any thoughts?