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Does how sexual you are change with the number of years in a marriage/relationship?

1K views 12 replies 12 participants last post by  WandaJ 
#1 ·
I've experienced women to be rather highly sexed at the start of a relationship. But this tends to decline sharply after 2-3 years.

Is this something others have experienced?
 
#2 ·
as a male - i Would do my SO daily (multiple if she would let me). Unfortunately, my SO no longer has that type of sexual/physical attraction to me. She is good with 2 or 3 times a year with me

very sad on my part.
 
#4 ·
Lots of sex + 2-3 years = 9 months + 2 year old child. AKA "terrible twos!"

Does tend to slow women down just a little!
But trust me, she is still very into you and wants more!


In order to maintain a very high level of sex with A woman (singular not plural!) after the 2-3 year mark, you will have to invest in one of these:


Or in the event your "highly sexed" female fails to reproduce after 2-3 years of constant mating, her instincts will kick in that something is probably wrong and extinguish the attraction in order to move on to a more fertile male.

So yes, 2-3 years you will notice a change.
 
#5 ·
Depends on whatever other life events are going on (in my experience). There is the commonly mentioned "wedding cake" that seems to instantly zap a woman's sex drive after consuming. In my case, I never had this issue (5 yrs before we got married and 5 yrs after we got married). Kids however has pretty much been the dealbreaker though after that 5 yr post marriage mark and I am sure there is some formula out there where you can calculate exactly how many times you hope t o have sex depending on how many kids you have lol...
 
#6 ·
Not directly, but it is well-known that the "falling in love" hormones at the beginning of a new romantic relationship tend to fade by the two year mark, and that is when sexual interest tends to decline. Then you see where a person's baseline sexual desire level is, but of course it is affected by many other factors - just not those new relationship hormones.

A sharp decline in sexual activity is not a given. Some couples keep the interest very high, I think because they are both high sex drive individuals with a good relationship. It may even increase, but often there is a slight decline, if only because of the time and stresses of jobs and perhaps having children.

For us, the decline was mostly due to getting older and experiencing hormonal changes - but dropping from 15-plus times a week to 6 to 10 times after 10 years isn't drastic.
 
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#7 ·
I think and have experienced a small decline. It is usually related to children, stress, aging or dying parents, money, jobs, illness = Life.

Life just gets in the way of being able to focus on each other as much as we would like.

Women also seem to have more difficulty shutting off their minds and being able to focus on the task at hand so to speak.

I will say that the Quantity has a tendency to go down but the Quality goes up.
 
#8 ·
I have never been one to loose my sex drive.. never had a dry spell where I was turned off by my husband , or didn't need it after so many days... Pregnancies made me more horny... I can't say children slowed me down, however I was more pre-occupied with them... meaning "not thinking about sex" as much as I could have been.. easily could have been for that matter..

I was never a tired wife, never had a headache.... other stupid things like reading too many books in bed were my blunders.. or putting babies in bed with us...I used to get on him for falling asleep too early !...I did , however.. have some hang ups with doing BJ's... I wanted the lights dim..

And I feel infertility troubles after our 1st son stole some of my thunder in exploring more -as this was a stressor on us -most difficult yrs for me..... Mid life brought about the most sexual years of all...
 
#9 ·
I think in most cases in women and in some cases men too. I think it's normal unless she doesn't want any sex. The newness of the relationship wears off and life happens. I think in most cases the biggest sex killer is having children. Hormones, body issues and being exhausted contribute to that. It can also be difficult for some women to go from Mommy to lover in minutes.
 
#10 ·
I know in my case, I definitely had a decline in how often I wanted to have sex about 4 yrs or so into marriage, no kids but husband had multiple health stuff going on, and maybe some anger and resentment on my part. But also I was never overly concerned about sex. Once a week was fine with me, but not him. Even with health issues, sex was big issue for him, or our lack thereof. I did try to make effort to be more interested, but I can go long periods of time without sex, I'm 54, I enjoy it, but just not a priority
 
#13 ·
It slow down after kids (which were ten years into relationship) for few years, when they were smaller. Then it got better, and now after twenty years is very good. And that despite years of resentments, fighting, and being (still) close to divorce.
 
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