Re: Why did my love died for my wife?
Bad idea? Yes.
You are in the "fog" of affair, the chemicals in your brain giving you the "high" just as a youngster in love with his first crush, not realizing you would or could ever feel this way again. But you can, we all can, when the right pieces in place.
This "high" is identical to a drug high, that is why you always thinking of this other person and looking for your next fix. This is how emotional affairs often turn to physical affairs and then turn to a disaster.
Stop the nonsense with this job lady.
That is just a bad idea on top of a bad idea. No sense in wrecking your career along with your marriage at the same time.
Put the same effort to discovering your wife as this job lady, to get your sexual "high" from inside the marriage, not some stranger from without.
Needless to say, if your wife is sexually distant and all these other tings, you have work that you are neglecting in your marriage anyway.
Even the job lady, where you to marry her after destroying your current marriage, will be the same way sexually with the same neglect after the same time wit the same behavior on your part if you do not change. Don't be fooled!
Stop your emotional affair.
Stop confiding in any "just friends" women about these marriage issues, nothing but danger danger danger! Find a good man to speak to about these things instead, or even the good men on this very forum would be a tousand times better than the fire you are playing with (at work even!)
Imagine you just met your wife today. What you do for her to get to know YOU?
Fold and iron laundry? Buy clothes for kids?
OF course not!
You do the same things you dreaming of doing with this job lady, planning of times to get togethr, maintaining your appearance, putting best foot forward, being humorous, sharing your deepest hopes, sharing your greatest fears, sharing your daringest dreams.
All these tings you instead need to be doing with your wife, and not just ironing clothes things!
Light the sexual fire to your wife and you, instead of the misery and destruction of some affair between you and this job lady!
I wish you well.
Decide what to be, and go be it. -Avett Brothers.