Re: Should I pick up my family and move?? Advice please..
No, do NOT tell the other woman. It is not your business to do so and she may not be as forgiving to her husband as your husband was to you. You were already responsible for participating in an illicit affair and hurting others like your husband. Don't continue the hurt.
You sound very remorseful and I agree with your concern that you cannot be friends with this other woman given your past relationship with her husband. I think you have made your bed, so lie in it. Moving is definitely an option if it makes sense and your husband is agreeable to it. Otherwise, spend your time making up excuses to avoid this other wife and her overtures for friendship. Eventually she will "get the picture" that you are avoiding her and don't want her friendship, and she will stop pursuing you. So be it, that's the price you pay. You obviously didn't care about her friendship when you were banging her husband. Besides, if you did tell her about the affair, do you think she's going to embrace you and be your best buddy?