Wife is behaving weird. Need some input - Page 8 - Talk About Marriage
General Relationship Discussion Although anyone can post anywhere on Talk About Marriage, this section is for people interested in general relationship and marriage advice.

User Tag List

 918Likes
 
LinkBack Thread Tools Search this Thread
post #106 of 800 (permalink) Old 10-21-2015, 01:32 PM
Member
 
Chaparral's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: Kentucky
Posts: 11,503
Re: Wife is behaving weird. Need some input

You have more than enough redflags for a May Day parade. The only flag you dont have is catching them in the sack together.

Cutting off sex at the same time they started meeting up, hiding while undressing, and so many others. Shes cheating with at least one other person maybe more, maybe a three some.

Can you live with her if its a lesbian relationship?

Chaparral is online now  
Sponsored Links
Advertisement
 
post #107 of 800 (permalink) Old 10-21-2015, 03:05 PM Thread Starter
Member
 
Deguello's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2015
Location: Westcoast us
Posts: 314
Re: Wife is behaving weird. Need some input

If it is a Lesbian or Bi relationship,it was in place but hidden long before I came on the scene,as far as living with it,that has yet to be realized, that's why I had an STD. test last week,that will be a huge trust issue at very least. you ask a question I can't answer right now,
That raises an interesting question about Oral sex,(her receiving)
Deguello

When Death Smiles,Marines Smile Back

Last edited by Deguello; 10-21-2015 at 03:25 PM. Reason: Sent to Wrong person
Deguello is offline  
post #108 of 800 (permalink) Old 10-21-2015, 03:21 PM Thread Starter
Member
 
Deguello's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2015
Location: Westcoast us
Posts: 314
Re: Wife is behaving weird. Need some input

If it is a Lesbian or a Bisexual relationship,it will put a huge strain on our relationship,She will have to tell her family,and our daughter,I normally do not have an issue with Lesbian or Bisexual people,this would be way to close to home. And it will have been already in place before We met,but well hidden. I just realized that her attitude towards oral sex had changed,and 180 degrees.She used to not like it at all,now she helps me please her.
Deguello
Deguello is offline  
 
post #109 of 800 (permalink) Old 10-21-2015, 03:30 PM Thread Starter
Member
 
Deguello's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2015
Location: Westcoast us
Posts: 314
Re: Wife is behaving weird. Need some input

Quote:
Originally Posted by marduk View Post
Ok.

So what's your plan?

How much evidence is enough?
Posted via Mobile Device
Enough evidence so there is NO Wiggle room
Deguello


When Death Smiles,Marines Smile Back
Deguello is offline  
post #110 of 800 (permalink) Old 10-21-2015, 03:40 PM
Member
 
imtamnew's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2013
Posts: 1,155
Re: Wife is behaving weird. Need some input

Wiggle room from what?

A sealed heart is the greatest penalty anyone incurs.
imtamnew is offline  
post #111 of 800 (permalink) Old 10-21-2015, 06:37 PM Thread Starter
Member
 
Deguello's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2015
Location: Westcoast us
Posts: 314
Re: Wife is behaving weird. Need some input

So that when that conversation does happen,I will have her with no doubt that I know and she will be accountable. She will have to inform The whole family or I will,it will trash a 45 year relationship,that really hurts to know that our marriage could be over. She now. 3.5 hours late from work,can't hardly wait for the excuse this time.
Deguello


When Death Smiles,Marines Smile back
Deguello is offline  
post #112 of 800 (permalink) Old 10-21-2015, 06:54 PM
Member
 
bandit.45's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2012
Posts: 17,257
Re: Wife is behaving weird. Need some input

So what are you waiting for?
Posted via Mobile Device
bandit.45 is offline  
post #113 of 800 (permalink) Old 10-21-2015, 06:54 PM
Member
 
happyman64's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: New York
Posts: 7,302
Re: Wife is behaving weird. Need some input

Why not hand your wife her black panties and ask her "Are you trying to send me a message?"

and when she stares at you like you have two heads then add

"Or did you send someone else a message?"

Try it. You might get an honest response.

But make sure you have the VAR ready in her or in her handbag because you do want to know the next time she forgets where she left her panties......
happyman64 is offline  
post #114 of 800 (permalink) Old 10-22-2015, 10:56 AM Thread Starter
Member
 
Deguello's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2015
Location: Westcoast us
Posts: 314
Re: Wife is behaving weird. Need some input

After I found them I said nothing,she told me that she had an "accident"this is .WGBS.but now she knows.that I know
That she is up to something with
Someone who ain't ME.I knew if I was patient she would make a mistake,
Deguello
Death Smiles At Everyone,Marines Smile Back
Deguello is offline  
post #115 of 800 (permalink) Old 10-22-2015, 11:08 AM
Member
 
marduk's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 7,490
Re: Wife is behaving weird. Need some input

chill, man.

What do you want to have happen here?

marduk is offline  
post #116 of 800 (permalink) Old 10-22-2015, 11:17 AM
Member
 
Join Date: May 2014
Posts: 530
Re: Wife is behaving weird. Need some input

Quote:
Originally Posted by bandit.45 View Post
So what are you waiting for?
Posted via Mobile Device
if she's kept it a secret for 5 long years, she’s not going to admit anything with what he has now.

A pair of underwear? “Had a senior bladder moment! “
Kissing the woman? “Oh, it wasn’t that long! You’re exaggerating! that’s what ladies do! “
An intimate, but not really sexual conversation on a var? “oh, we were just being silly!”

She’s been in the closet for a 45 year marriage…she’s thought of every excuse in the book

I think you need a PI to see where they go after they pick up food. And/or a pen var in her purse
ReidWright is offline  
post #117 of 800 (permalink) Old 10-22-2015, 11:33 AM
Member
 
bandit.45's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2012
Posts: 17,257
Re: Wife is behaving weird. Need some input

Quote:
Originally Posted by ReidWright View Post
if she's kept it a secret for 5 long years, she’s not going to admit anything with what he has now.

A pair of underwear? “Had a senior bladder moment! “
Kissing the woman? “Oh, it wasn’t that long! You’re exaggerating! that’s what ladies do! “
An intimate, but not really sexual conversation on a var? “oh, we were just being silly!”

She’s been in the closet for a 45 year marriage…she’s thought of every excuse in the book

I think you need a PI to see where they go after they pick up food. And/or a pen var in her purse


In his case I think a PI is the only way he will get solid evidence. What he has now is definitely suspicious, but he needs damning evidence.
bandit.45 is offline  
post #118 of 800 (permalink) Old 10-22-2015, 05:50 PM Thread Starter
Member
 
Deguello's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2015
Location: Westcoast us
Posts: 314
Re: Wife is behaving weird. Need some input

Does any one know if it's legal to do surveillance on you own home? It getting to be time for lunch again,this time I won't lose them, I think I know where they are going.
Deguello

When Death Smiles,Marines Smile Back.
Deguello is offline  
post #119 of 800 (permalink) Old 10-22-2015, 05:50 PM
Member
 
Thor's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2011
Posts: 8,771
Re: Wife is behaving weird. Need some input

Remember, never ever reveal your source of information! You shouldn't have let her know you found the panties. Don't let any other suspicions slip! She'll be more careful now. If she finds out any of your spy methods she will know to evade them. Now is the time to act like all is well, while you collect more data.
Thor is offline  
post #120 of 800 (permalink) Old 10-22-2015, 05:57 PM
Member
 
Thor's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2011
Posts: 8,771
Re: Wife is behaving weird. Need some input

Quote:
Originally Posted by Deguello View Post
Does any one know if it's legal to do surveillance on you own home? It getting to be time for lunch again,this time I won't lose them, I think I know where they are going.
Deguello

When Death Smiles,Marines Smile Back.
Legal depends on what you use it for. If it is for only your own info, then nobody will ever know about it. Thus nothing to worry about. But if you're looking for something to use in court, then you have to talk to a good local atty.

In general you should be able to surveil your own home. A nanny-cam or VAR can be placed there for general home security. Lots of people have internet connected cameras in their home to watch the kids or dogs.

Where it gets tricky is a keylogger on the computer. Chances are you would never be prosecuted if found out, but the warning I offer is if there is anything confidential your wife does, be very careful. If she has medical info, patient data, financial client info, or legal client info, then that stuff is all protected by federal and maybe state law. Also, if her computer is owned by her employer you could run into problems with them.

But, again, if you're just looking to read her emails and chat sessions for your own info, nobody is going to prosecute you even if it is probably illegal. Don't show it to anybody.

Same with a VAR. Recording a conversation usually requires at least one person, and sometimes all people, in the conversation to know about the recording. You can put a VAR where she makes private calls, but you can never tell anyone that you've done it, and you can never use the info in court. But it could inform you of what is going on.

Any data you will be using for court needs to be backed up in several secure places. You need a lawyer to help you collect data if it is for court.
Thor is offline  
Sponsored Links
Advertisement
 
Reply

Quick Reply
Message:
Options

Register Now



In order to be able to post messages on Talk About Marriage, you must first register. Please enter your desired user name, your email address and other required details in the form below.

Important! Your username will be visible to the public next to anything you post and could show up in search engines like Google. If you are concerned about anonymity, PLEASE choose a username that will not be recognizable to anyone you know.

User Name:
Password
Please enter a password for your user account. Note that passwords are case-sensitive.

Password:


Confirm Password:
Email Address
Please enter a valid email address for yourself.

Email Address:
OR

Log-in









Human Verification

In order to verify that you are a human and not a spam bot, please enter the answer into the following box below based on the instructions contained in the graphic.



Thread Tools Search this Thread
Show Printable Version Show Printable Version
Email this Page Email this Page
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search



Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Advice for my folks - dad behaving badly Healer General Relationship Discussion 6 05-31-2015 12:59 PM
Wife acting weird..really weird Diesel_Bomber Considering Divorce or Separation 15 09-07-2013 08:33 PM
Not cheating....but behaving like you are. Cee Paul Coping with Infidelity 15 08-15-2012 11:04 PM
Adult children behaving badly Colette Nolan The Family & Parenting Forums 2 07-12-2011 05:02 PM

Posting Rules  
You may post new threads
You may post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off

 
For the best viewing experience please update your browser to Google Chrome