Lifeisquick

I feel immature asking this, but I'm also not afraid to admit that I'm sort of immature and inexperienced anyway...


I never drank or partied much in high school, but I think I regret it because I'm curious now as to what it was all about. Now I'm in college and I know that it would be very easy to have a crazy party stereotypical college lifestyle.


I also have a somewhat typical guy urge to go to these parties and make out with / possibly sleep with lots of girls (using protection)...I have the idea in my head (and PLEASE correct me if its an idiotic one) that doing this will sort "get it out of my system" and then later down the road make me appreciate having a stable girlfriend or wife. Basically get sick of the lifestyle so that I can really like being with one person, rather than forever wondering what the party lifestyle is like.

So ideally I want married guys to answer this, but of course I want all of your thoughts.

Leahdorus

I was not a partier in high school either, so my first year living in the dorms in college, I got a little crazy. Crazy by my standards, but that was still pretty tame by most. I drank a lot, fooled around with guys while way drunk (not all that fun, really), and my roommate was stoned ALL the time. I didn't do any drugs, but I think I had a contact high every day for the whole time I lived in that dorm room, there was so much pot smoke in there. After that first year, I moved to an apartment and while there was partying, it wasn't as much as the prior year, and I could take it or leave it.

What I found was that I really don't like that sort of lifestyle at all. I also can't drink much tequila anymore, without feeling queasy.

I say have some fun in college, keep your grades up, and see what happens. Maybe you'll be like me and just not be that into it. I didn't want to have a boyfriend who was into that sort of thing because I wasn't, and knew it wouldn't be a good match.

Have fun!

Melancholy

I don't agree that you need to go out and "sew your oats" before a long term relationship just to get it out of your system. Yes, you have raging hormones and girls are very attractive at college. But you should be a little concerned about keeping some decency and dignity for yourself. Also, your future spouse may appreciate that you didn't have 100+ partners before them.

Have fun in college, but remember you are there for your education and to meet and network with others. Your objective shouldn't be to get wasted and laid every weekend.

*Aceso*

My advice is, do whatever you want to do while single so that you don't wake up one day and say to yourself:"I wish I did....."
Before I settled down I traveled everywhere, did all the stupid things, made many mistakes (and learned from them ) and alwasy lived by one motto "It's better to regret what you have done then to regret something you haven't".
You are young. Live a little.

draconis

Even with protection you can still get an STD and there is still a chance to get her pregnant although reduced. Further, things like crabs, shingles and lice don't care how carefull you are. I have had seven partners my entire life, yet I partied like the ****ens. Do some people look back and feel they missed out? Sure, plenty of people on here married young and never enjoyed the 21-25 party range of drinking and socializing. But, I always did it with my gal, and never strayed. Never felt like I missed anything. The first time is not only awkward but normally the worst so why have that many bad experiences that people will judge you by?

draconis

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GAsoccerman

Live it up dude, your only in college for a short time.

I dated my wife through college, But we went to schools in different states, we went to our own parties and had our own friends.

I enjoyed socializing and drinking with my male friends, didn't need to sleep around to have a good time,

I beem married to my wife for 13 years we still like to go out and have a wild time and party, not much has changed but "how we party" has, we do have three kids, so we are in check, it's more socializing then "drunk"

enjoy your time, but when I met my wife I knew she was the one. But we were young and enjoyed our youth, there was no pressure for me to be the perfect guy, nor her to be the perfect girlfriend. We would call each other and chat and laugh, get together when we could. Never asked her about what she did at parties, she never asked me.

If were you I would just have a good time and not worry about things, becuase when the right girl comes along you will know it.

we ahve a big dress up halloween party every year and a big Luau every summer, our friends and neighbors LOVE it, it's 2 times of the year they ahve a blast like the college days, and the kids LOVE it as well.

*Aceso*

Yep, when you have kids hangovers are not a good thing. That's why I drink once or twice a year.

draconis

Same here and the grand parents have them that (those nights).

draconis

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Blanca

I remember watching the people that did drugs and drank and stuff, and got 'around'. I was so turned off by that lifestyle. I couldn't believe all the drama and the horrible situations they got themselves into (car accidents, abortions, single moms, diseases, fights, depression, etc). I thought they were the dumbest people I ever met and I never wanted to be like them.

I have a few people in my family that thought this lifestyle was 'fun', too. Two sisters are divorced, one of which has cervical cancer and cant have kids. my brother is a single alcoholic. The 'fun' just never stops for him.

My two oldests are married for 10+ years, have kids, and a good life. They never partied.

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voivod

this is mirrored throughout society. be good, good will happen for you. be bad...bad things...

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separated, honoring wife and family daily, she deserves the best me i can give her.


4 kids g18, g12, g11, b7

*Aceso*

I am sorry, but you can't tell me that your sister has a cancer because she partied. I knew a girl that died from it and she was your typical "perfect" girl. Never drank, smoked, took drugs and then she died at the age of 28 (still a virgin because she was saving herself for marriage). So there, sometimes it's the cards you have been dealt and other times you invite bad things in your life.

No way. No way. Everybody did some bad things in their life at least once but if you learn from it and move on. If you don't learn anything....well that's when things turn to s#!t.

brad

Party hard!!
I did it all in college and beyond. You name it (threesomes etc.) I did it.
I am now married and have two kids.
boy am I glad I did all those things. I will never wonder like so many others what it was like to do so.

voivod

okay, here's how it works. you wake up, go to class, come back to the dorm, call some friends, borrow your buddy's stereo, haul it up the stairs, hook it up, can't get that damned left speaker to work, people start showing up, no one brought beer cuz they thought you were having a keg, somebody gets into your munchy stash, someone else shows up half drunk, falls down in you bathroom, riipping the shower curtain down. then you do the beer run, come back, you pictures are ripped off the wall, your ****tail table is busted because some drunk chick fell over it. she's "passed out" in your room on your bed, dudes are trying to "wake her up," neighbors call the cops, whole thing gets busted.

oh yeah, did you drink? you're hung over the next morning, when it starts all over again. fun, huh?

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separated, honoring wife and family daily, she deserves the best me i can give her.


4 kids g18, g12, g11, b7

Blanca

cervical cancer...and actually i never said she had it b/c she partied. I said she partied and had cervical cancer. but never said it was a cause and effect relationship. these were just examples from my own immediate family of the two different lifestyles. i feel i am blessed to have a lot of family so that i can learn which lifestyle i want to live.

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GAsoccerman

LJ and Void, I will also have to disagree with you.

My wife and I both partied, at different schools.

We are not drug addicts, not alcholohics, not criminals.

We both have very successful jobs, been married 13 years, no major issues in our marriage, 3 great smart children.

I oach numerous sport teams for my children, we do boy scouts and girl scouts, I am the HOA president, I ran my 20 year reunion from another state. I ahve allot of friends and well liked.

Anyone that goes to college, pretty much 95% party at some point. the issue is do you go overbaord every weekend or once in a blue moon? I worked 2 jobs and paid my own way through college, but when I wanted to blow off steam and hang with my boys I did and had a great time.

Academics came first, but partying helped relieve some stressful things as a youth.

I think being part of a fraternity or a sority is a good thing. It is good networking and good community service.

I say each to their own, If he parties, let him, just be responsible. I never drove drunk, we had a friend that did not drink at all, but he "partied with us" we always bought his food and soft drinks when we went out.

Again, it's about responsibility and maturity, learning life's lessons and experimenting.

Hey if it's not for you then don't do it, but for some, it is a good thing. I LOVED my college days, they were a blast.

Now when we "party" it is more socializing and having fun with our friends then anything else.

Life is short, enjoy it.

Cancer has nothing to do with this.