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Welcome to Talk About Marriage

155K views 214 replies 143 participants last post by  Chris H. 
#1 ·
Welcome to Talk About Marriage.

Talk About Marriage is a forum to discuss marriage and relationships. Here, we interpret the word "marriage" loosely, recognizing that many different people from different cultures view marriage differently. It is important to be patient and respectful with other members, no matter how different our views are.

Please read our forum guidelines before posting on Talk About Marriage.

If you have a relationship problem that you want feedback on, the best place to start is in the General Relationship Discussion section. Click this link, and click the "New Thread" button at the top left to start a new thread about whatever it is that you want feedback on.

If you have technical difficulties with the website, please post them in the technical difficulties section.

Thanks for visiting.
 
#174 ·
Hello all,

I am looking forward to join the community here. greetings from switzerland!

Monique



Welcome to Talk About Marriage.

Talk About Marriage is a forum to discuss marriage and relationships. Here, we interpret the word "marriage" loosely, recognizing that many different people from different cultures view marriage differently.

I started Talk About Marriage because I know that there are a ton of people out there looking for help and support in their relationships. Talk About Marriage provides a unique opportunity for people to anonymously post and provide feedback to others about their relationships. There is no cost for using this website; it is entirely supported by advertising and it's parent site, The Family & Marriage Counseling Directory.

The Family & Marriage Counseling Directory has been one of the top sites in the search engines for "Marriage Counseling" and "Family Counseling" since 2003. Because of this, I am aware of the masses of people that are searching for help on the internet. Based on some rough statistics, I can estimate that about a half million visitors came to the site this past year.

Talk About Marriage is designed to be a community forum for those interested in talking to others about their relationships, but perhaps not ready to take the extra step to get professional help. Be aware that there are professionals available for relationship help all around the world, and The Family & Marriage Counseling Directory is just a small sample of therapists who have chosen to advertise.

The American Association of Marriage and Family Therapy has a service called Therapist Locator, which lists trained marriage and family therapists in the US, Canada, and Overseas.

The American Psychological Association also has a referral service called the APA Help Center.

In addition, the Open Directory Project has a category full of other mental health counseling directories. And there are advertisers on this site who provide professional services as well.

As you can see, I am partial to professional help. One reason being, that I have a post-graduate degree in Social Work, and I believe it to be a worthy field with impeccable values. The other reason I am partial to professional help, is that I've done my own work in different forms of therapy for many years, and I've found it to be an incredible life-enriching process that has helped me to become a good husband and father. Therapy has a way of helping me see things I wouldn't normally see, and learn things about myself that I might never have learned.

Of course, I've heard all of the horror stories about therapists out there who "did this" or "said that!" I'm very fortunate that the one's I've spent time with have been well-trained and ethical. People should be aware that every state has licensing bodies who are there to deal with unethical behavior, and it is our duty to report unethical conduct.

That brings me back to this forum :D . Please read our posting guidelines. This forum is open to the general public, and there is no guarantee about what anyone here might say. Please be respectful of others, regardless of how different your views are.

Thank you for visiting my site.


Chris Hartwell
 
#175 ·
Hi
I'm new here, been lurking for ages and just felt like saying hello. I have found this site both a comfort and an inspiration at times.
Reading posts about the pain of discovering cheating I find most heart rending and reading posts about stories of recovery and rediscovery of love heart warming. I am married and find that throughout everything, everything, all the hardest times, times when I felt like closing down and not letting anything hurt me, the most important thing is to keep the communication lines open (I know it's been said before). Talk, touch and sometimes even shout and scream and basically honor the commitment to do whatever it takes to keep the passion and the love alive. If you're going to keep something to yourself only do it until you can recompose yourself. If an issue is important enough DO get it out in the open even if it is painful. Take time to examine yourself, and ask yourself regularly when an issue comes up, "How important is this to me?". Leave stuff until you are clear where you are really coming from. Sometimes I find we can communicate a feeling or an idea and it gets jumbled message across because our feelings are jumbled and we don't know what we really need, talk about it, get it clear what you are really looking for. Is the issue really to do with your partner or are you tired or stressed or hungry and taking your mood out on your nearest and dearest. Are you bored or unhappy with yourself, what do you need, what can you do for yourself? I don't know, I am probably not the best person to give advice. I just wanted to share with you the stuff that made the glue that has helped us to connect and stay together through the hard stuff.
 
#177 ·
Hi everyone,

I just wanted to say 'hi'. So, hi. I've never posted on a forum like this, so I'm a little nervous about it.

I've been married for seven years and we have three children (6, 5, and 2). Our eldest is seriously ill (she has a 30% chance of survival). I'm having a little trouble keeping my family together as this situation has really highlighted the different approaches my husband and I have to parenting (of course I realise this is not the best time to be making big decisions).

It's nice to find somewhere to talk to people who aren't directly involved.

Thank you. :)
 
#181 ·
I am a 44 year old married woman with 6 children. My husband and I have struggled through 9 years. Happiness has been lost a long time ago. I am not blaming him for all, however, I have been begging him to listen to me for at least 5 years. I have been distant and feeling trapped. I am a stay home mother who has gotten a college degree. He is a hard worker and good father, our children range from 24-6 year old twins. 4 still living at home. For awhile now, I haven't felt physical attraction . For a long time intimacy has felt like part of my duties. Recently I have fallen in love with a woman. I need help badly.
 
#185 ·
hello all am new to this forum just registered i am having probbs with my new wife, i moved to indonesia from england to marry the woman of my dreams and it turns out shes mardy mizzarable and controlling.. i have been married nearly 2 months and we argue nearly everyday even on our honeymoon to bali we was arguing,i want to go back to england asap!! but i cant just run its not nice,living at parents house and got no money left feels bad so am going bk to uk soon she wants to come too but doesnt want a british passport which is silly, we dont agree on hardly anything and its all bcuz of me we argue or cuz she thinks she is always right am 25 shes 24me and my bro ,i got a business in uk and she wants me to forget about it and stay in indonesia which i think is throwing my achievments away,and she says divorce in anger she gets angry and mardy very easy is v depressing i dont like mosqitoes either am kind of stranded here : ( am so stressed i dont know what to do, i went to pchsycoligst with her and that doesnt seem to work and she wont let me do things i enjoy like pc games and other stuff she says am wrong shes right and its all my fault $aybe it is i dont know she knew i wasnt perfect b4 she married me.i am easy going she isnt i dont get angry she does and she hits me doesnt hurt but still she shouldnt do that i dont hit her!! i dont know...
well any free advice would be much appreciated thankyou for your time : )
 
#187 ·
To Twoplusthree...
In the past I have found the little things are important. What I mean is to take time to spend with your younger ones. They need both of your attention. Sometimes with serious illness or death all the emphasis is placed here; the others are pushed aside. Just 5 or 10 special minutes a day each to read a story or take a walk can do it.
 
#188 ·
Hello Talk About Marriage fellow members! I just came across the site in search of some material to help my marriage. My name is April - been married for 6 years - and we have a 3 year old little man. He is my world. I am having some issues with my marriage and hope this site allows me to vent, get advice, and see the light at the end of the tunnel.
 
#190 ·
Been on and off this site a few times, never really explained what I am doing here.
Married for 12 years, have a 10 and 5 year old. Our communication is broken... marriage on life support, we carry on like roomates who have common interest for our childen. She has stated on more than one occasion that she has thought about divorce. I am quickly coming to the point where I dont care.
I absolutly have my own faults, but I have never hit her, cheated, etc, but latley I day dream that she does leave me. Magically, with no wish for child/alimony suport as I keep the kids, house, etc. (Its my dream let me have it!) I know that isnt healthy. So I keep looking through these threads for answers , suggestions, makes me feel more normal to know others have problems. Thanks to everyone who puts in so much time helping others with thought provoking responses to their problems.
 
#191 ·
Warbaby, communication is the biggest problem I have in my marriage. That's why I'm here. It is so hard. I can tell you from my point of view I wish my husband would just sit down with me and tell me how he feels. Good or bad I just want to know. Even if he told me he was through with the marriage it would be better than how we are living now. At least then we could move forward. I hear alot of people say men are not talkers and they keep things bottled up but if my husband would talk to me more I think we could resolve some issues. Maybe you should try having a heart to heart. Couldn't hurt. Don't feel bad though, I have had that thought of my husband magiclly disappearing too...lol I feel bad about it but it does cross my mind. No red tape, just poof... I wish you luck with your wife and family.
 
#195 ·
Hopefully I can figure out how to use this site!! I am having an issue in my marriage and it's one I definitely feel I need feedback on. Unfortunately, I don't have anyone close to me I feel I can talk about this to. So, I decided I will try this direction!! And now I will go post a thread (is that correct?) and start working through the issue with insight from others. Thanks!!
 
#196 ·
Hello,

I am new here. This looks like just the place I've been looking for! Hubby and I have hit a really rather rough spot in our marriage, and I don't believe in involving family and friends in our marriage and problems...hence, not really having anyone to talk to.

Anyway, I just wanted to stop and say "Hi".
 
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