Help -- relationship breakup due to lack of immediate action in "emergency situation"

pablopable · 08-20-2011, 11:21 AM

Hello,

One of my friends has recently broken up. The reason being that she did not respond in a timely manner in an "emergency situation". Can you please analyse this situation and help her out by having a firm opinion: if she should pursue him or she should move on?

Some background:
She is 40, has always lived with her parents. Recently she met a guy, same age, same nationality, who is also living with his parents most of his life.

They had been dating for 1 year and he proposed to her. They were engaged to be married the next year. He lives about 90 minutes away from her place.

Situation:

The boy's father is sick and once had to be entered in ER on a week day. She was informed of this the same day and decided to visit the family on the weekend because she had work the next day. When she arrived that weekend, the boy's mother said it was "too late". The father eventually recovered and went back home.

The next week he broke up with her.

Recent development:
Half a year passed now just few days ago on his b'day, she emailed him saying she would like to get back with him. He replied he would have to ask his mother. She says the mother is hard to please.

thanks

PBear · 08-20-2011, 11:34 AM

The "boy" is the man she's interested in? If so, and he's 40 years old and he's looking for permission from his mother on who he's allowed to date, I'd think she's better off looking elsewhere. Perhaps there's cultural issues involved, but it seems like she's looking at a long uphill battle, and he's not fighting on her side.

C
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lovesherman · 08-20-2011, 11:39 AM

I agree with PBear. These two are not acting like 40 year old mature adults. They have lived with their parents too long, and will have trouble maintaining a marriage.

A man who thinks he should ask his mother if he should get back with a woman is not ready to have a relationship. He will never place his wife before his mother, and there will be nothing the wife can do to change this.

There is a reason the Bible says when we get married we leave our family and cleave to our spouse. I see nothing but trouble for this relationship.

Entropy3000 · 08-20-2011, 12:07 PM

What exit?