JM777

My wife of almost seven years told me around May of this year that she didn't know if she loved me anymore, really out of the blue. We have had a troubled past but that it was all in the past we had just moved in Jan and it was a stressful time. (Back story) I quit my job so we could move closer to family to help out with the kids was staying with family and I couldn't find a job so my wife started looking she got one. I started going to school full time and watching the kids. She started hanging out with friends at work after work no problem she never has had many friends. But then she started staying out all night long almost every night. Not really getting any quality time with her, I didn't mind her hanging out but that seems a little much and inappropriate. She shut herself off emotionally from me no touching no kissing no anything. We can talk about stuff but not about our relationship. about three or four months of this and were drinking at home and we end up making out for the first time in forever stops there though and she wont talk about it. She has since quite her job do to health issues, were living off my military benefits right now. We had sex after we had been drinking and she won't talk about us at all. I have continually tried having conversations with her about whats going on and what her thoughts are and how all this is making me feel but she never says anything. Most recently I tried talking to her yesterday almost putting my heart on the line and nothing not a word. I ended up sending her an long email today about lots of stuff about how I was feeling an such. I have my suspicions that there might be somebody else involved but she told me no that was awhile ago, I have since found proof that an ex coworker does care for her but I do not know her involvement level at the moment. I don't understand why she won't talk to me about any of this unless she has done something and doesn't want to come clean, i just don't know anything at all cause she won't tell me anything. If she is actively acting against our marriage I would rather know and deal with that than not knowing. I am lost as how to proceed and or deal with any of this. I am seeing an therapist and am becoming more and more depressed by the day.

jnj express

IMHO---your wife was/is having an A.

You should move this over to the infidelity section

Why would you allow her to hangout, and stay out all night, and think nothing of it----those kinds of things are done when you are single

You took vows, that means, it is the two of of you and NO ONE ELSE---she doesn't get to hang out, or stay out all night

The 2 of you need to get into some counseling---if your wife refuses to go to counseling, or converse about the marital problems, including her A., which you seem to just gloss over---then you may need to threaten her with some consequences, otherwise you ain't gonna see any change.

Stonewall

She is stepping out on you. Read this thread you will learn a lot about what to expect and how to handle it.

Wife travels a lot, sex life has stalled, worried - help!