General Relationship DiscussionAlthough anyone can post anywhere on Talk About Marriage, this section is for people interested in general relationship and marriage advice.
Our wedding was small. Well we planned it small. The church only sat about 100 people and we didn't expect it to even be close to full. It was overflowing.
I did all the decorating myself. My wife's boquet and every flower in the church were hand picked by me from our parents yards and make into the decorations. We still had her boquet until a fire last year destroyed everything.
We laugh about the wedding becasue the pastor was 15 minutes late. then he started talking about our racecars and mating eagles during the ceremony.
It was a happy day... I think her mom paid for most of it and my mom gave us a week long stay in cancun as a present.
My wife is incredibly talented, and wanted a dream wedding, but she was also pretty practical. I promised my aunt that I would sandblast and repaint all of the old candelabras and wedding equipment from her shop in exchange for using it, plus she provided catering, saving us a thousand or more dollars. My wife was very well liked in her church, so every single thing was provided, including professional photography and video. She worked so hard. Her aunt owned a wedding shop and gave her a really expensive dress. Friends even paid for a beach home on a small island off the east coast for the honeymoon. Incredibly, we asked for almost nothing, other than the loaner from my aunt. Everything was just offered. Our pastor was comanchee, but a Christian. Since many of our guests from my family were native american, and a small tribe that still clings to the heritage, we incorporated blessings from an elder, spiritual leader. It ended up being a very nice, formal marriage, but with meaningful changes. However, after the reception, the native american cousins almost got into it with the biker friends from my parents biker group, I'm told. The normal people from my wife's side were horrified.
My husband and I married atop our favorite dormant volcano last year... 2 years after meeting/having a friendship... 41 days after dating. Might have been soon... but I wouldn't change a thing.
Originally planned it to be just he and I, our three mutts and the officiant, but at the last minute we invited our parents. I'm glad we did... It was the first time I met his family, and they were awesome right off the bat!
My two little girlie dogs, S80 and Panda were the "Flower Girls" complete with little flowered collars, (I made them) and my Male dog, Beauford wore a tie as the "Ring Bearer". We only had cheapie Walmart rings at the time, courtesy my mother.
That_Girl makes me want to scrounge up a photo... We had many taken, (over 60) and WALMART destroyed them while making a back-up. No the back-up was never made.
So we have only a handful, I just have to find one...
Is this okay to post??
It was a perfect day... I just wish I had more to remember it by.
You probably don`t even have a clue how much stress and conflict you avoided.
Well done!!
Isn't that one-size-fits all mentality the same as someone who would declare that marriage itself is a waste of time?
Some people are very practical. We need people like this, and I could even see myself buying into this mindset with the right woman. But my wife wanted a dream. She wanted something that she she would remember for the rest of her life. I don't think that made her unintelligent. She was the president of Phi Beta Kappa in her college, and has an incredible career. To her, the headaches were worth it.
Its the same type of scenario that came up with engagement rings. Some practical people consider them a waste. But to some people, it is part of a dream. I've added diamonds to my wife's ring over the years, and her dream is to be able to give one of the stones to each of our children for their own engagement. To me, that was very touching. Of course, my son is very practical. He'll probably use the gift to justify buying hmself a new car with the avoided cost.
We had a mid-morning spiritual service at a beautiful garden (approx 50 guests) followed by a lunch at my dad's restaurant. By 4pm we were headed out the door!
I got my outfit for under $100
My flowers were GORGEOUS -I got them at Sobey's grocery flower dept for $80 –they were so excited to do a 'real flower job' they put their heart & soul into it.
My dad paid for lunch, and the rest of the wedding costs were less than $500
When I think back at our wedding, I wouldn't change a thing. No one knew it was “cheap” except us! I loved it,, wouldn't change a thing.
We did the one location banquet hall for our wedding and reception. We married in April and caught the last available "off season" discount date available. We had 60 guests and made sure to invite only those we really wanted there. Total cost for our wedding was 12000 including my dress photographer and the highlight of our night a photobooth. All we wanted was for everyone to have a great time and we definately accomplished that. We had numerous guests tell us it was the best wedding they ever attended ( and actually meant it lol). Keeping it relaxed, having an open bar, making sure the dj was playing good music and having a candy buffett all added to the " fun" atmosphere. My husband worked very hard on making sure the decorations were perfect and was there very early on our wedding day setting up centrepieces and hanging curtains.
For what we had we could have easily spent 20000... but we really took the iniative to do lots on our own and be creative in the planning. It really was perfect. Posted via Mobile Device
Isn't that one-size-fits all mentality the same as someone who would declare that marriage itself is a waste of time?
Some people are very practical. We need people like this, and I could even see myself buying into this mindset with the right woman. But my wife wanted a dream. She wanted something that she she would remember for the rest of her life. I don't think that made her unintelligent. She was the president of Phi Beta Kappa in her college, and has an incredible career. To her, the headaches were worth it.
Its the same type of scenario that came up with engagement rings. Some practical people consider them a waste. But to some people, it is part of a dream. I've added diamonds to my wife's ring over the years, and her dream is to be able to give one of the stones to each of our children for their own engagement. To me, that was very touching. Of course, my son is very practical. He'll probably use the gift to justify buying hmself a new car with the avoided cost.
I would have had my dream wedding, if we had more money then.
My wedding ring set is a very important symbol in my eyes. It attracts a lot of compliments and when I look at it, I see how much my husband loved me when he proposed.
We got married at the town hall. It was actually in a tiny room with just a conference table and some chairs. The officiant (the mayor) was wearing jeans and was late. We had our two required witnesses and I think 2 or 3 other people happened to be there, but that's it. We didn't spend any money except the bureaucratic expenses, like the marriage licenses. My dress cost $35 and is very re-wearable.
The place where we got married is a tiny TINY island with a total population of 300. It was absolutely GORGEOUS. We were actually living there at the time. It was just perfect. I wouldn't change a thing.
We would like to have a reception some day. Maybe a vow renewal. We originally planned to have a more "traditional" wedding but for financial reasons decided against it. But I have no regrets. DH is more into the "real wedding" than I am (mainly because I'm the one who does the finances!).
Neither my wife nor I wanted a big wedding. The only reason we wanted to have a ceremony at all was for my grandfather (our only remaining grandparent) who won't be around much longer.
We did a small off-season ceremony at a place in northern Michigan right on Lake Michigan. Total guest list, including us, was 14 people (parents, grandpa, siblings and spouses, and one additional each plus their spouse if there was one). We had a friend do flowers and got a deal on the package. Something like $1500 including two nights for us in the resort, the ceremony, dinner, cake, and photographer. We splurged on an extra two nights. She spent $1000 total on dress and alterations (her parents really pushed that she have the dress she want regardless of cost) and I bought a couple nice suits as I'm going to be on a job search soon when I finish grad school.
We had her brother perform the ceremony. This turned out great since he really knew us very well. Lots of Lord of the Rings and Star Wars references included. The only really bad point was that the photographer kept having my grandpa move back and forth and he almost fell over several times. Every one of us was getting quite irritated that she was so interested in framing her shots just right that she didn't even notice that she was asking an 86 year old man to do things he really couldn't.
Overall, the ceremony was really beautiful but her parents pushing what they wanted caused a lot of stress and resentment from both of us especially their insistence on a reception back home and we ended up wishing we had just gone to a court house (but that's another story).
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Re: What kind of a wedding did you have? 
and my Male dog, Beauford wore a tie as the "Ring Bearer". We only had cheapie Walmart rings at the time, courtesy my mother.
Re: What kind of a wedding did you have? 
