Re: Not sure now!
I'm really getting upset about this now. My head is completely jumbled! It seems I'm doing all of the work emotionally, while he goes about his life as usual. His way of making things better is to be affectionate and make me a nice dessert. We used to joke about his 'peace offering dessert' but now it really hurts that he invalidates my feelings like this. Of course, this leaves problems unresolved and my anger builds up.
Wedding plans are not spoken about if I don't bring them up and neither is our future. He will go through stages of throwing in little comments about our future but it is always because I have said that it upsets me that he doesn't do this. I have asked him if he still wants to get married or if he thinks I'm the right person for him. He says he wants to and I am.
We are happy when we don't fight but when I tell him his inactions hurt me, he promises to improve and then isn't consistent with this then of course I get upset and we fight because I feel I can't trust him. I feel so ignored sometimes. It's as if my feelings don't matter. I think he just wants to have a 'fair weather relationship'. How can someone be so stupid and say they don't like fighting but they don't hold up their end of the bargain. Of course I'll get angry!
I am so unhappy because I don't know how to fix our problems and I can't fix them on my own. He makes me feel like the requests I make of him are unreasonable but they are really just the basics of a happy, healthy, connected relationship. Do you think he just wants an easy relationship? Should I just give up and leave?