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How long do you wait?

1K views 12 replies 11 participants last post by  Nucking Futs 
#1 ·
So let's say your wife throws her ring at you packs up and moves out demanding a divorce... how long do you Wait to look for somebody else?

1] immediately
2] after the divorce is final
3] 1 year for every 5 married
4] never

I'm truly curious to what you all think.
 
#4 ·
Lol... I don't. I don't ever plan to be with a person again in a relationship. But I was just curious what the general concensus was.

That being said, as a fairly young attractive male, should that situation happen to me, and an attractive female approached for no string attached interations, I wasn't sure what the rule should be. (And no, no one has or would most likely ever will approach me, it is more a curious question then anything else... heck it's friday night, aren't I allowed to think random thoughts?)
 
#5 ·
I was married at 18, divorced by 20. I didn't get into a serious relationship for 9 years - which was with my new husband. I started dating 6 years after my divorce but it was very casual, and never progressed to anything (additional dates or intimacy). I think that was too long to wait, for the record.
 
#7 ·
Only after the divorce is final with a "grieving period" of some indeterminate amount of time!

After all, at least nowadays in most legal jurisdictions, I'd have to say that most family court magistrates don't really give a tinker's damn as to whether you fool around pre-divorce, but if an expensive jury trial or a court trial is ever elected, under a lot of those rules of court, the infidelity itself can be brought into evidence in such matters of say, property settlement, child custody, and parental visitation!

In any event, it's probably always best never to be in a position of being caught "bumping uglies" prior to the gavel falling on a final resolution of divorce!
 
#9 ·
I was married for twenty years. My divorce was final on a Tuesday and I had my first date that Friday, a friend had fixed me up. Odd thing is that woman I went out with had been divorced for something like 15 years and ALL she wanted to talk about is her ex and why her marriage failed. The last thing in the world I wanted to talk about was my ex! It seemed I was more ready to be "out there" than she was.

So to answer your question there is no time table. If you do go on a date and the conversation seems more like a therapy session I would say you're not ready.

By the way I have been divorced for nine years now, still single. I like to meet new people so do occasionally ask a woman out, but I explain I am no longer relationship material, I just want to have a nice dinner or attend an event together.
 
#13 ·
I disagree with the "after the divorce is final" crowd. Once the divorce is filed the rest is just legal formalities in my book so I would consider myself free to date when ever I felt ready for it once filed.
 
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