Dealing with depression. - Talk About Marriage
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post #1 of 6 (permalink) Old 03-01-2017, 12:08 AM Thread Starter
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Dealing with depression.

Hey guys. Been a while . hope your all doing extremely well and 2017 is treating you right.

I've been thinking about it for quite a while, did some research and after all these years of neglecting it, i think i have really bad depression. It just never bothered me as I never really cared about myself, it was like whatever happened happened. And now after such a long time and me being in the state I am in right now I wanna get help for it.

Thing is idk where to start. Well I kinda do. I'm gonna see a doctor in the morning. Hopefully he can set me in the right direction to get further help. Its only recently I've discovered how unhappy I am. Its not even moments pretty much all the time. I try to fight it but i just get overtaken by those gloomy feelings and it gets to me. I try doing things to change it all but I always end up in a mess.

I started a new job in January to get out of the old stressful one. This one turned out to be worst, it was hard, I use to get up 3:45am and get home 7pm. Did that for over a month then the work itself came to an end.

Now I'm back to my disgusting old ways. Waking until 2/3 in the morning. Getting up mid day and just wasting the entire day. I went job hunting the other day so I'm hoping I get a call soon, whatever comes I'll take it.

Other than that I haven't started anything. And I don't think I can. I never feel motivated or inspired to do anything. I don't get that feeling to get up and go , that hustle and push you have as a young person. I dont have it. And until i sort out my mental struggles i will never move forward.

So other than the doctor? What can i do to deal with depression and move past it? Thanks guys.

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post #2 of 6 (permalink) Old 03-01-2017, 06:43 AM
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Re: Dealing with depression.

Quote:
Originally Posted by 2inthemorning View Post
Hey guys. Been a while . hope your all doing extremely well and 2017 is treating you right.

I've been thinking about it for quite a while, did some research and after all these years of neglecting it, i think i have really bad depression. It just never bothered me as I never really cared about myself, it was like whatever happened happened. And now after such a long time and me being in the state I am in right now I wanna get help for it.

Thing is idk where to start. Well I kinda do. I'm gonna see a doctor in the morning. Hopefully he can set me in the right direction to get further help. Its only recently I've discovered how unhappy I am. Its not even moments pretty much all the time. I try to fight it but i just get overtaken by those gloomy feelings and it gets to me. I try doing things to change it all but I always end up in a mess.

I started a new job in January to get out of the old stressful one. This one turned out to be worst, it was hard, I use to get up 3:45am and get home 7pm. Did that for over a month then the work itself came to an end.

Now I'm back to my disgusting old ways. Waking until 2/3 in the morning. Getting up mid day and just wasting the entire day. I went job hunting the other day so I'm hoping I get a call soon, whatever comes I'll take it.

Other than that I haven't started anything. And I don't think I can. I never feel motivated or inspired to do anything. I don't get that feeling to get up and go , that hustle and push you have as a young person. I dont have it. And until i sort out my mental struggles i will never move forward.

So other than the doctor? What can i do to deal with depression and move past it? Thanks guys.


It is always a good start in the right direction to seek medical help. Good for you.

As someone the PTSD, I suffer with depression, anxiety and all the other fun stuff that goes along with it. Medications helps a lot to keep me stable, however they do not deal with what got me here in the first place.

I find that what has been really helpful for me was to seek out counselling. I see a counsellor every couple weeks and we talk about what is going on and I get to let out my feelings about the trauma that has happened in my life.

In the past I have seen personal counsellors through my medical benefits. The counsellor I am seeing now is through the local mental health organization and is totally free and there was no waiting list.

Aside from just straight counselling, many counsellors are trained in DBT and CBT.
These are behaviour therapies that help a person change the way they look at situations and in turn change the thought process which helps ease depression and anxiety.

Good luck on your journey. I do not know where you live so I cannot be more specific in where to seek help, however your doctor should be able to point you in the right direction.


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post #3 of 6 (permalink) Old 03-01-2017, 07:07 AM
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Re: Dealing with depression.

Exercise. Sounds stupid maybe, and it can be really hard to motivate to do it. But once there, exercise really improves the mood.

It can be an activity you enjoy, or a hard labour chore you've been putting off. Anything that works the muscles and makes you physically tired. Gardening works for me.
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post #4 of 6 (permalink) Old 03-13-2017, 11:19 AM
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Re: Dealing with depression.

The fastest way to refill yourself with life energy is to spend time in nature. The best effect will be from regular walks, which are at least 1-2 hours long. The less people you will see during these walks, the better, because in this case you will not have the pressure to "play your social role" and react to their presence (even in distance), and you will be able to fully concentrate on yourself without distractions. If you are too tired to walk then you can just sit somewhere in the wood or at the lake/ river/sea and listen to the nature sounds and to your own deepest thoughts/feelings.

And this is important – you have to listen to yourself very carefully, because your fatigue syndrome has emerged due to significant events in your life, when you didn’t listened to yourself and made various logical (but not heartfelt) decisions, which contradict to your true nature.
In some areas of your life you are living the fake version of yourself for a long time, and it steals from you the life energy and therefore you feel yourself constantly tired.

To improve ones emotional state, some people suggest simple meditation, but I personally don't like it. It doesn't work for me. In my case, the best "meditation" is walking in wild nature.

During these walks think about what YOU REALLY WANT to feel better in EACH and EVERY moment of your life.

Analyze how you communicate with people, can you say NO, when you really want to say NO; can you ask other people for what you really want or you always try to sacrifice yourself to look better in their eyes; can you tell your real opinion, or you always try to compromise, thus trying avoid conflicts or to upset someone.

You don’t have to improve yourself. On the contrary, you have to identify events in your own life (including childhood) that pushed you away from yourself. You also have to UNLEARN the things that you have read or heard and used in order to create artificial “improved” version of yourself.

The process will be slow, but step by step you will start to live the life the way you want........and you will be able to show to the world that you feel very good the way you are…… that you love yourself the way you are…….. that you are not a victim, who desperately tries to correct his “imaginary faults” to get acceptance from others……but a confident and self-contained person, who really feels good about itself, who radiates life energy.....and enjoys life.....
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post #5 of 6 (permalink) Old 03-15-2017, 06:01 PM
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Re: Dealing with depression.

The first thing you did was recognize that you need help. Perhaps you need an antidepressant to help. I have battled depression/anxiety and lots of other stuff since 2001 when I crashed and was at the point of hurting myself. I went on antidepressants for about 5 years and I haven't been on them since. Not to say I am cured as I am far from it but I have found other things to help me such as exercising and eating healthy, I see a wonderful counselor now every 6 weeks but I did start off going every week, I do mindfulness and meditation, and I have had CBT. My GP who has known me for many years has also been a great supporter and knows what I am like and how I am very self aware of my body. I would say start seeing a counselor and make sure it is one that you are comfortable with. You should know after the first 2-3 times. And go from there. Maybe this counselor can be a type of life coach too and help you get on a path of happiness in all directions. It takes time so don't rush.
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post #6 of 6 (permalink) Old 03-16-2017, 01:55 AM
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Re: Dealing with depression.

Struggle with depression and anxiety individual therapy is vitally important in providing you with the time and space necessary to retrain your thinking, explore your core struggles and deepen your understanding of how to manage or even heal your life.
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