I need to lose weight. My husband has told me so as well. I am exhausted. And breastfeeding. But it is no excuse. I know I need to be responsible for me. Others consider me to be attractive still. I am approached by men regularly.
First of all, this has NOTHING to do with ANYTHING here. It sounds to me like you're setting yourself up to take the blame for your husband cheating!! STOP that. Right now.
My husband set up counseling. Called his family and mine to admit to what he did. He wants to stay together.
This is a great teeny tiny very first step towards your husband proving he's worthy of R. But if he thinks this is all he has to do then he needs a slap in the head. This is only the beginning.
I feel so disgusted.
As you should. What your husband did WAS disgusting.
I also don't want my children to have a broken home.
What does a 'broken' home mean, really? People throw this term around all the time to describe any marriage break up. But would you call it a 'broken' home if the wife was having the crap beaten out of her and she left? I wouldn't. I would call that home FIXED because they got rid of the cause of the problem. Being married to an unremorseful cheater is broken. Divorcing one IS NOT.
How do I know that no physical contact occurred? How do I know he won't do this again?
You don't. There are absolutely NO guarantees. With your husband, my husband, or any other husband or wife. NO ONE can guarantee this, ever. But what you can do is decide for yourself whether your husband has proven to you that he has done every single thing humanly possible to assure you of his remorse. EVERYthing.
Quitting work is not an option.
It HAS to be, or you will never truly heal. If this is truly the case, then divorce is far more likely. Finding another job is an absolute must for you to EVER feel secure with him in the future.
Your job right now (aside from taking care of yourself, eating and drinking enough, sleeping and exercising, plus taking care of your kids!) is to find out whether your husband is truly remorseful. Start by reading the thread below. Oh, and tell him he has to get STD tested and supply you with the results in writing to prove he hasn't infected himself somehow. Welcome TAM CWI newbies- please read this