Wife flirts with everyone

faux · 12-24-2011, 11:26 PM

I love my wife but she likes to go out and drink a lot. She is honest but she likes to flirt with guys when I'm not around or when she drinks. We've been married less than a year and she was like that before we got married, it just keeps bothering me more and more. I don't want to divorce her but I don't know what I can do. I won't ever be happy with my marriage if it's always like this. She IS very honest with me, but she's such a social butterfly and gets drunk and does very inappropriate **** and there's really nothing I can do about it. She told me one of her supervisors at work has been touching her and she admitted to flirting with the guy at first but she said she doesn't want to get him in trouble. What the **** am I supposed to do other than go over there start **** with the guy?

artemisfowle · 12-25-2011, 12:31 AM

Have you tried talking to your wife about all this. Regardless if she's been like this in the past or not it's not appropriate in a relationship.

F-102 · 12-25-2011, 07:14 AM

You can't tell her what to do, but you can tell YOU what to do. Tell her it either stops or you divorce her.

Sanity · 12-25-2011, 08:48 AM

Alcohol abuse has no place in a healthy marriage. Time for a sit down. As previous stated you can't control anybody but yourself do give her the choice of being married or drinking and disrespecting the marriage which will lead to divorce. This is not something a married person does.

My ex wife would look for any excuse to drink because she was "stressed". Personally I find females that drink excessively or to "relax" concerning.

Does she come home really drunk?
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MrK · 12-25-2011, 12:19 PM

I can guarantee you she has not been as honest as you think. And if she hasn't screwed around YET with anyone she prowls around for she will. I can GUARANTEE that. Drinking to excess in places men look for strange? Rape is a VERY real possibility. With the extent of her problem, almost a foregone conclusion.

Next time she goes out, you leave. Period.

What kind of meat markets does she frequent? Nightclubs, pickup dives, hotel lounges? I'm getting sick just thinking about it.

If you can afford it, hire a PI t get some cell phone video of her "flirting". I can guarantee it will be an eye-opener.

faux · 12-25-2011, 03:20 PM

Well she is honest, and she usually doesn't go out without me. Thing is I'm taking care of some business in another state. She goes to local bars with friends from work sometimes. When she does drink though she doesn't know when to stop and gets super drunk and flirts and acts like a ****.

Sanity · 12-25-2011, 04:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by faux

Well she is honest, and she usually doesn't go out without me. Thing is I'm taking care of some business in another state. She goes to local bars with friends from work sometimes. When she does drink though she doesn't know when to stop and gets super drunk and flirts and acts like a ****.

Ultimately it's really what YOU are willing to accept/tolerate. Personally this would be a deal breaker as drunk women look cheap and classless. I would be embarrassed to have a wife like that. When you guys dating was she a drinker? Did she drink with you? Remember that alcohol lowers inhibitions to nothing. My brothers ex GF who was smoking hot tended to drink in excess and drunk dial me and say intimate things about their relantionship. Made me very uncomfortable and i just stopped taking her calls and told my brother. She eventually cheated on him with some guy while on GNO.

Alcohol has no place in a healthy marriage.
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EleGirl · 12-25-2011, 04:23 PM

She did this before you married her and yet you married her?

You need to tell your wife that you do not will not accept her going out with friends to get drunk and flirt with guys. If she does not stop you will get a divorce. If you do not tell her this and mean it, then stop gripping. You put up with this behavior be you were married. She thinks it's ok with you.

Also tell her that when you are out of town, her doing this is even more of a deal breaker.

It sounds to me like your wife is an alcoholic. Until she hits rock bottom she will not stop the drinking. If you threatening divorce will not get her to give up drinking, bar hopping and being a bar **** then your marriage is over... the alcohol wins.

Does she drive drunk? If she does and causes an accident you can also plan to spend the rest of your life paying off a huge law suit.

What exactly were you thinking when you married her?

RDJ · 12-25-2011, 04:48 PM

Not exactly the same, but I hope you will get the basic point.

I wish you the best!

Quote:

Originally Posted by RDJ

She had a drinking problem (I have never drank). I expressed that her drinking was affecting our marriage and that she needed to slow down and if necessary, get help. Again, she was pi$$ed! Told me that I would NOT control her. I poured all of her alcohol down the sink. I expressed that she was free to drink all she wants, but NOT in our home. She left, came back with a bottle, I poured it down the sink and repeated my statement. She is free to drink, not in our home. She packed a bag and left. I expressed that I wanted her, not a drunk, she was free to come home when she could control her drinking (not stop, just control) 10 days later, she came home. I acted as though it never happened, I am loving as long as WE stay within boundaries. She now drinks, but does not get drunk, I'm fine with that.