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post #16 of 17 (permalink) Old 03-06-2017, 05:42 PM
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Re: Marriage advice

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Originally Posted by SarahJean3 View Post
I see your point the only problem I have with that is that I dont think it's fair for me to have to delete my social medias, just because he can't handle using his. I'm a stay at home mom so I like to go online and keep up with my friends and relatives and I don't think that should be taken away from me because he can't handle using his. I know it's not something I NEED, if I thought that anything I was doing online was damaging my marriage I would have no problem what so ever saying goodbye to it, but I have done nothing for him to worry or have any doubts that I'm faithful To him and he knows that
So if you think you can convince him to give up his social media while you keep yours, that would solve your problem. But if he gives you trouble about it, your choice may be to give up yours or give up on him.

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post #17 of 17 (permalink) Old 03-06-2017, 05:51 PM
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Re: Marriage advice

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Originally Posted by SarahJean3 View Post
I understand that most men do watch porn and as I said before, I wouldn't be upset with him occasionally watching porn on his own time as long as it's women he doesn't have the potential of meeting in real life if he feels the need to do that I can live with that.

The problem I had was that my husband was visiting the page and looking at photos of ONE women, every single day. A women that I have met in real life, and that he even was friends with on fb. This is someone from our hometown. That's where I have a problem. her pictures are of her modeling and mostly bikini photos but when my husband is clearly fantasing about this one women everyday that's where I have an issue.
Porn is total fantasy. Men have no expectation of meeting those women. Before my divorce, many times I used to think of it being my wife who was the woman in the porn, and me doing those things with her.

But this other woman whom he knows in real life, yeah that's a problem. One factor is she is a professional model marketing her brand, so she isn't putting herself out there as available. So I don't think there is any real possibility of him meeting with her for sex. But it is a psychological or emotional problem for him to be repeatedly viewing her photos. I think it amounts to some form of attachment which diverts his energies from the marriage, and that makes it unacceptable even though he won't ever actually have an affair with her.
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