Re: Unsure of when to confront cheater
Talk to a lawyer right away. Get your legal ducks in a row, ready to go after she finishes her last final exam of the semester.
As to confrontation, it depends on your goal.
The train has left the station as far as preventing an affair. If you want to kill an affair to save the marriage, you would confront after you have gathered proof positive of the affair. Then you expose widely for the purpose of making the affair very uncomfortable to continue. This, hopefully, would remove a major obstacle to reconciliation.
But if your intent is to divorce, there is no reason to have a big confrontation. She knows she's cheated numerous times. You know she's cheated. All you have to say is "I know you've been cheating and here are the divorce papers". You can use the threat of exposure as a lever to get her to cooperate in the divorce process. Not blackmail though. As long as she doesn't lie about you, doesn't ask for ridiculous property settlements, etc, you have no reason to out her affairs to the world. Offer her a fair settlement which she can sign off on, and in return you don't go scorched earth on her.
Last edited by Thor; 03-18-2017 at 10:33 AM.