As for having an affiar, I am quite sure she does not. I sometimes secretly went through snoop mode just to find out proofs. I took notice to the styles she dressed up, see if it looks pretty obvious than usual, how often her schedule has been made for an outside activities without me going along with her.
I even tracked her dialing numbers and contacts through email and social media channels (LINE for example) on her smart phone, see if they are obvious numbers/male names she got in touch so often. I kept observing her behavior and see if she secretly did something alone repeatedly while being aware that someone will see her. I found nothing wrong with that.
Except a regular work hour, she barely goes out to other places without me. Yes, someday she went home late after work but she is always available for my call, so I know exactly where she is. Alternatively, I can easily check with her friends at work for her whereabouts.
I believe in her honesty that she won't betray me by having an affair. Anyway it is necessay to always keep aware of that, just in case.
Well, thanks to EleGirl
for a helpful suggestion. I would take the first book you recommend, read it and share it with my wife, and see if it's worth following the instruction.
I talked to my wife last night and she suggested that she prefers to have sex during weekend/holiday where we have no rush and worry while staying comfortably at home. Other than that period, she is not ready for it at all.
Originally Posted by Young at Heart View Post
As an aside, there are things like KY Jelly, and Coconut oil to provide lube that prevent discomfort during intercourse. There are even vaginal suppository lubes.
Your spending lots and lots of time together does not mean she is getting the "right kind of time" to make her feel loved.
Chapman's book the 5 Languages of Love had a profound positive impact on my Sex Starved Marriage. I learned that my wife's primary and secondary love languages are acts of service and quality time. My primary and secondary love languages are touch and words of affirmation. (The 5th love language is presents.)
Thanks to "Young at Heart
", I just talked to her and she agrees to apply alternative lubes like KY Jelly, etc. to prevent discomfort during intercourse. However, it's best to have natural lube secreted inside of her, actually.
Originally Posted by FrazzledSadHusband View Post
Read No More Mr. Nice Guy, you may be TOO nice.
Workout, get yourself in best shape you can be, ALWAYS.
Both of you read the 5 love languages book & take the quiz & discuss
Here is a site with many good articles for your wife - When It Hurts: Maintaining Sexual Intimacy While Dealing with Pain - The Forgiven Wife
Does your wife have any abuse in her past?
If you don't make it clear to her that this is affecting your marriage, it will get worse.
Thanks to FrazzledSadHusband
for recommending a great book. I like the way it sounds -- No More Mr. Nice Guy. I would read it soon.
She really embarrassed and feels awkward when showing and opening her vagina to my sight. This is my biggest problem because I don't know why she feels like that. When asked, she simply say she doesn't know why but she is just shy to let me see hers. I tried to convince her there's nothing wrong with doing that, but it didn't work. Perhaps, she is not turned on sexually much enough, so she is very defensive and embarrassed. It is my responsibility to find out what turns her on to sexual desire. Maybe seeking advice from a relationship counsellor could help.
I will give it a shot with her during weekend and see what's gonna be.