We cleared a lot of subjects last night during our talk, and in the end, he got teary and said that he's sure that we're going to be okay, and that everything is going to work out for us. I felt the need to tell him that I wasn't sure he understood the gravity of the situation, and that after 3-ish years of my being checked out, that I really am not sure if it's possible to check back in or fall in love with someone again. He is hell bent on trying until we make it, and I'm still on the fence about this whole situation. I really don't want to be a divorcee, but I also want to be happy, and I want him to be happy too.
Three years is a long time to be checked out. A long
time. If you haven't managed to want to come back
to him in 3 YEARS, doesn't that pretty much tell you that you've already tried as much as you can? What could you possibly regret? Not being checked out for 5
years or 10
Oh, and after pretty much telling him I'm almost done, and not really in love with him anymore, he was still ready for some sex, which never happened, but he was still ready to roll. Is this normal?
Most of them will take it any
way they can get it. Back off male posters, I said MOST.
Last night, he said that he would love to have a family with me, but when I mentioned that he might have to give up his 1 after-work activity should we have children, he kind of balked at that, and said that he wouldn't give it up, but would just have to find a time that worked better to take part in it. I, on the other, understand that I would have to give up my 2 activities.
Well isn't he self-important and self-entitled, thinking he shouldn't give up anything to have the kids he apparently wants so
bad - but he's fully on-board with YOU making all the sacrifices. Add on the fact that he has genetic abnormalities in his gene pool and that would pretty much seal the deal for me as far as even considering having kids with him.
Seriously, if having children is something you absolutely want to do and you don't love this man anymore, he's a complete dead end and you'll grow to resent him if you sacrifice having children so you can waste more of your time 'trying to fall in love with him again.' It's completely pointless.
Sometimes, you just need to know when to fold your cards and get up from the table.
Good luck to you.