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post #31 of 81 (permalink) Old 04-01-2017, 11:24 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Considering breaking off engagment and relationship with my fiancee

No, My one bike is a Ducati 959 Panigale and my other bike is a Yamaha R6 Just rather hard to give up something in which you love as I do riding I don't even own a car lol, She owns our only four-wheel vehicle and its a new truck. I don't want to move on from my fiancee at all I love her a lot just I don't know I guess I am just being dumb/stubborn. I don't know what I will do riding is a passion and a lot of fun. Rather die doing something I enjoyed but I guess I can't think like that anymore.

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post #32 of 81 (permalink) Old 04-02-2017, 12:14 AM
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Re: Considering breaking off engagment and relationship with my fiancee

First they make you sell the bike. Then the end of fun. Soon enough you're neutered and tamed. That's when she looses interest in you because you're exactly what she made you. And a kid in the way? Goodbye sex life.


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post #33 of 81 (permalink) Old 04-02-2017, 12:16 AM
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Re: Considering breaking off engagment and relationship with my fiancee

I'd tell her she needs to learn to ride the r6 of your out.


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post #34 of 81 (permalink) Old 04-02-2017, 12:21 AM
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Re: Considering breaking off engagment and relationship with my fiancee

Biz,
She is pregnant now. That does change things. I am not suggesting you sell your bikes, BUT I have a pointed question for you. How much life insurance do you have?

At your (young) age, term insurance is very inexpensive. Ballpark cost ratio is 2000 to 1 per year. For example, if you earn 75k and bring home 60k, you could get 600K of insurance for 25$/month. That my man - is a LOT of peace of mind for a partner as it represents 10 years of take home.

And - this doesn't reflect on your skills as a driver. It is simply recognition that many drivers on the road today are talking / texting or otherwise distracted.


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We wanted to start a family and thought now was as good as a time as any honestly.

She is also trying to change me per-say she wants me to sell my two Sportsbikes and stop riding and I guess this is probably where a lot of the not good parts of the relationship and fighting are coming from. I haven't ever had a wreck and I don't ride dumb and have been riding since I was 17 and am very responsible with it and all of a sudden since the wedding planning got underway and what have you she has been riding me to sell them and stop riding because she feels like I am gonna get seriously injured or something on them. I mean I don't understand why this is becoming an issue now when it wasn't before. And I have asked her about it but she can't give me a reason as to why.
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post #35 of 81 (permalink) Old 04-02-2017, 12:35 AM
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Re: Considering breaking off engagment and relationship with my fiancee

Biz,
If you love the woman, stop the cold feet BS and take care of business.
Does she ever lie to you?
Does she have weak character?
Does she look forward to seeing you every day?
I don't know about everyone, but I have three kids and sex was never a problem. Actually, her drive picked up in her mid thirties and she left me to go chase more dicks with more money. Told me so. Said if I made 150k or more a year, 99% of our problems would disapear.

Don't worry about the sex if it's good and regular now. Do t worry about anything but her character.
Yeah, she may turn out to be horrible. None of them come with an owner's manual or a written guarantee.

You don't have to quit riding. But you probably should. It's super dangerous. But if you live it that much...,.., She knows that about you already.
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post #36 of 81 (permalink) Old 04-02-2017, 12:55 AM
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Re: Considering breaking off engagment and relationship with my fiancee

No way you come off looking good if you abandon your pregnant fiancee. The divorce courts will eat you up and spit you out if you get married and then leave her. You still will get slammed for child support and the medical costs. Plus you will always feel guilty for doing so and have to confront your child some day because he mom has been telling him/her that you deserted her because she was pregnant with him/her. Then you next girlfriend will learn about it and have second thoughts about a man who leaves his pregnant girlfriend or wife, soon after the child is born. You are between a rock and a hard place but that is what happens when you do not use protection. Pregnancies, whether planned or unplanned, ruin lots of relationships and marriages. It takes two to make a baby and now you have the responsibility to take care of the child. If you marry you also have to support your new wife. If you do not love her, the logical thing to do is tell her you do not love her but you will be there to support the child and her. You will have child support payments for 18 years. If you divorce after you marry, you will have both child support and alimony. Plus you get to give your wife half of your property and money. All because someone took no protection against pregnancy or wanted a child before they married. You are screwed.

Many prefer to drown in a pool of their own morality rather than seek the safety of a different morality.
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post #37 of 81 (permalink) Old 04-02-2017, 01:25 AM
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Re: Considering breaking off engagment and relationship with my fiancee

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Originally Posted by WorkingOnMe View Post
First they make you sell the bike. Then the end of fun. Soon enough you're neutered and tamed. That's when she looses interest in you because you're exactly what she made you. And a kid in the way? Goodbye sex life.


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Ouch!!

This....This is the nub of the stick that pokes me in the eye when the light of day energizes my optic nerve....SunCMars.... The Allegory of the Cave--> On this, I did a '180' and stepped out.

The Lion in Winter. Invictus..By Will, Shall... Saved from harm by my friends.
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post #38 of 81 (permalink) Old 04-02-2017, 01:56 AM
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Re: Considering breaking off engagment and relationship with my fiancee

959 Ducati Pangale'

Nice bike!

158 Hp

440 lbs. very light

160 mph when the engine slams into the rev limiter.

1/3 x 160 = ~53

53 -10 years = 43 years old. You can ride it then. That should age/mature you enough!

Yea, right...

This....This is the nub of the stick that pokes me in the eye when the light of day energizes my optic nerve....SunCMars.... The Allegory of the Cave--> On this, I did a '180' and stepped out.

The Lion in Winter. Invictus..By Will, Shall... Saved from harm by my friends.
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post #39 of 81 (permalink) Old 04-02-2017, 02:07 AM Thread Starter
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Re: Considering breaking off engagment and relationship with my fiancee

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959 Ducati Pangale'

Nice bike!

158 Hp

440 lbs. very light

160 mph when the engine slams into the rev limiter.

1/3 x 160 = ~53

53 -10 years = 43 years old. You can ride it then. That should age/mature you enough!

Yea, right...
Yeahhhhhh Sureeeeeeeeee. But in all seriousness never hit the max speed on the bike. And I just bought 2mill in life insurance not three months ago so I feel like my bases are covered there.
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post #40 of 81 (permalink) Old 04-02-2017, 02:08 AM Thread Starter
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Re: Considering breaking off engagment and relationship with my fiancee

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Originally Posted by WorkingOnMe View Post
First they make you sell the bike. Then the end of fun. Soon enough you're neutered and tamed. That's when she looses interest in you because you're exactly what she made you. And a kid in the way? Goodbye sex life.


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Well that is a brutal way to look at it.

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I'd tell her she needs to learn to ride the r6 of your out.


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She used to ride with me stopped a few months before she even found out she was pregnant I suppose her spidey senses about the pregnancy were great or she has just been trying to change me or at least on her mind for awhile.

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post #41 of 81 (permalink) Old 04-02-2017, 02:11 AM Thread Starter
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Re: Considering breaking off engagment and relationship with my fiancee

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Originally Posted by Evinrude58 View Post
Biz,
If you love the woman, stop the cold feet BS and take care of business.
Does she ever lie to you?
Does she have weak character?
Does she look forward to seeing you every day?
I don't know about everyone, but I have three kids and sex was never a problem. Actually, her drive picked up in her mid thirties and she left me to go chase more dicks with more money. Told me so. Said if I made 150k or more a year, 99% of our problems would disapear.

Don't worry about the sex if it's good and regular now. Do t worry about anything but her character.
Yeah, she may turn out to be horrible. None of them come with an owner's manual or a written guarantee.

You don't have to quit riding. But you probably should. It's super dangerous. But if you live it that much...,.., She knows that about you already.
If she truly understood how much I truly loved it then she wouldn't try to be changing me I feel like. No she hasn't ever lied to me but she has kept things from me a few times to try and protect me. And no her character isn't weak and she used to look forward to seeing me but since the wedding has been getting closer and closer and the pregnancy it is like I am on the back burner.
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post #42 of 81 (permalink) Old 04-02-2017, 03:40 AM
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Re: Considering breaking off engagment and relationship with my fiancee

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I don't want to break her heart and I don't want to hurt her in anyway, But I guess my options are limited and we are already tot his point so I might as well carry on with the marriage.

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no!

Don't EVER get married if you're not ABSOLUTELY sure this is a best possible idea.

Don't do it.

I cannot go into details due to privacy issues, but I knew my first marriage was a mistake. I was too constrained by social pressure to call it off---even though my heart and brain told me I should.

I regretted it deeply.

You need to follow your gut instinct. Do NOT feel you can't call it off. Ever.
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post #43 of 81 (permalink) Old 04-02-2017, 11:11 AM
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Re: Considering breaking off engagment and relationship with my fiancee

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The relationship isn't terrible but it isn't the best it could possibly be either. We haven't fought as much as we have these past two weeks about the wedding her family and I mean we usually work as a team and don't let anything come in between us but it feels like she cares more about her family and this wedding then me at times.
She is pregnant, hormones are going stir crazy in her. It happens, trust me, my wife would start crying out of the blue for no reason and unable to say why. The arguments could be because she is expecting and her hormones are off.
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post #44 of 81 (permalink) Old 04-02-2017, 07:37 PM
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Re: Considering breaking off engagment and relationship with my fiancee

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The relationship isn't terrible but it isn't the best it could possibly be either. We haven't fought as much as we have these past two weeks about the wedding her family and I mean we usually work as a team and don't let anything come in between us but it feels like she cares more about her family and this wedding then me at times.
Did you tell HER that? This is a time of stress. You need to talk even more now.
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post #45 of 81 (permalink) Old 04-02-2017, 10:11 PM
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Re: Considering breaking off engagment and relationship with my fiancee

The relationship isn't as good as it could be.

Yet both of you thought this was a good time to get pregnant.

HUH????????

Planning a wedding is stressful. Pregnancy is stressful.

Please expand on WHY this was a "good" time to start a family. Seriously.

P.S. - How old are both of you?

I refuse to make anyone a priority in my life who considers me nothing more than an option.

You can't start the next chapter of your life if you keep re-reading the last one.
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