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post #76 of 141 (permalink) Old 04-04-2017, 05:49 PM Thread Starter
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Re: So it's been 2 weeks

Wow! The urge to text her today has been extremely high. I didn't, though.

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post #77 of 141 (permalink) Old 04-04-2017, 06:30 PM
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Re: So it's been 2 weeks

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Wow! The urge to text her today has been extremely high. I didn't, though.
Good job. It'll get easier as time goes by and your focus is on following through with the plan you make to improve your situation.

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post #78 of 141 (permalink) Old 04-04-2017, 07:58 PM Thread Starter
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Re: So it's been 2 weeks

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Good job. It'll get easier as time goes by and your focus is on following through with the plan you make to improve your situation.
Well, I'll probably see her tomorrow as I plan on returning to Wednesday night bible study. She's usually always there. Instead of sitting in my normal seat which is one table away and facing her, I'll sit on the opposite side with my back to her. That way I won't be tempted to glance at her.
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post #79 of 141 (permalink) Old 04-04-2017, 09:15 PM
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Re: So it's been 2 weeks

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Man, at the end of the day, all I have is tons of idle time. I use to pray quite frequently along with regular bible study. When you have nothing else to do, you get tired of doing that.
You just said that you have no time because you work so many hours.
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post #80 of 141 (permalink) Old 04-04-2017, 09:30 PM
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Re: So it's been 2 weeks

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The ways I've tried to fix it only lead me to doing things that I feel guilty about, i.e., going to bars & clubs regularly (they're the only social outlets available after 9 pm), drinking excessively, giving in to sexual desires with women I know aren't right for me, and the list goes on.

Sounds like fun to me.
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post #81 of 141 (permalink) Old 04-04-2017, 09:40 PM Thread Starter
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Re: So it's been 2 weeks

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I don't have days off. My regular job is 4-12 hr days with 1-10 hr day. On my "off" days, I give private baseball lessons for 4 or 5 hrs. I work 7 days a week and I've done so for the past 3+ years.
Wednesday is my 1-10 hour day that allows me to make it to bible study.
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post #82 of 141 (permalink) Old 04-04-2017, 10:14 PM
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Re: So it's been 2 weeks

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Yeah. It sucks having no one. I am extremely lonely most of the time. I don't know how to fix it or I would have done it long ago. The ways I've tried to fix it only lead me to doing things that I feel guilty about, i.e., going to bars & clubs regularly (they're the only social outlets available after 9 pm), drinking excessively, giving in to sexual desires with women I know aren't right for me, and the list goes on. So to prevent me from doing those things, I just stay home.
You do know that for christians sex outside marriage is a no no right?
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post #83 of 141 (permalink) Old 04-05-2017, 02:41 PM Thread Starter
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Re: So it's been 2 weeks

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You do know that for christians sex outside marriage is a no no right?
Maybe you missed the part where I spoke about being guilty of certain things or maybe you didn't. Anyhow, yes, I know. Sheesh!
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post #84 of 141 (permalink) Old 04-05-2017, 02:48 PM
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Re: So it's been 2 weeks

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Maybe you missed the part where I spoke about being guilty of certain things or maybe you didn't. Anyhow, yes, I know. Sheesh!
So ok is that something you are going to stop now? That alone will be badly affecting your relationship with God. Also think of a future lady who may have strong moral values.
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post #85 of 141 (permalink) Old 04-05-2017, 06:52 PM Thread Starter
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Re: So it's been 2 weeks

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So ok is that something you are going to stop now? That alone will be badly affecting your relationship with God. Also think of a future lady who may have strong moral values.
I'd like to say that I WILL stop but I don't know if I can promise that it'll never happen again. If I encountered a women who swore of premarital sex, it would make it a lot easier for me. But when you're seeing someone and they practically start throwing themself at you, a man can only fight the urge for so long.

OAN, I got an upclose and personal look at what obsessing over a woman looks like today. A coworker I've known for years played me message after message of her ex-boyfriends proclaiming his love for her and his unwillingness to take no for an answer. It was rough to listen to and they broke up 3 months ago. I'm not nearly that bad...wow!

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post #86 of 141 (permalink) Old 04-05-2017, 06:59 PM
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Re: So it's been 2 weeks

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I'd like to say that I WILL stop but I don't know if I can promise that it'll never happen again. If I encountered a women who swore of premarital sex, it would make it a lot easier for me. But when you're seeing someone and they practically start throwing themself at you, a man can only fight the urge for so long.
I'm curious how you can justify this.

You're a Christian man who does bible study and attends church on Sundays and all of that, and you know that having extramarital sex is against all the rules of Christianity and yet you've already broken that rule multiple times and just might do it again if she throws herself at you.

Aren't you worried about going to Hell or something?
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post #87 of 141 (permalink) Old 04-05-2017, 07:14 PM Thread Starter
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Re: So it's been 2 weeks

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I'm curious how you can justify this.

Aren't you worried about going to Hell or something?
I can't justify it so I won't try. Being Christian doesn't make me perfect. I'm human just like everyone else. What I can say is my biblical studies have shown it's much worse to make a vow to God to do something and then not do than it is to not vow at all.

And no, I'm not worried about going to hell. Having accepted Jesus as my savior guarantees my place in heaven.
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post #88 of 141 (permalink) Old 04-05-2017, 08:50 PM Thread Starter
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Re: So it's been 2 weeks

Tonight, due to severe weather, our bible study was cancelled so this means by Sunday, there will have been 3 complete weeks of strict no contact. While I did feel a strong urge to reach out to her yesterday, today was quite different. It seems that each passing day helps the feelings dissipate more and more. Getting out to the gym 4-5 days a week definitely helps. Witnessing another guy look absolutely pathetic with the continuous voicemails proclaiming his undying love for his ex also helped. I refuse to be that guy.

I'm actually gonna go out and do some karaoke tonight which is something I haven't done in a while. It should be fun. Anyhow, day 18 of NC is about to be in the books!!!
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post #89 of 141 (permalink) Old 04-06-2017, 03:04 AM
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Re: So it's been 2 weeks

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I'd like to say that I WILL stop but I don't know if I can promise that it'll never happen again. If I encountered a women who swore of premarital sex, it would make it a lot easier for me. But when you're seeing someone and they practically start throwing themself at you, a man can only fight the urge for so long.

OAN, I got an upclose and personal look at what obsessing over a woman looks like today. A coworker I've known for years played me message after message of her ex-boyfriends proclaiming his love for her and his unwillingness to take no for an answer. It was rough to listen to and they broke up 3 months ago. I'm not nearly that bad...wow!
Its not hard, you dont date a woman unless she is a committed christian who obeys God in this area. Its not something you are forced to do, its your choice to sin or not. The thing is that the more women you have sex with the less likely you are to attract a lady with good moral values. You make it sound as if you are helpless and have no self control.
When my first marriage ended after 23 years, I made the decision not to date or marry a man unless he obeyed God in the area of no sex outside marriage. I was blessed that I met and married such a man.

In the end are you serious about your faith or not?
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post #90 of 141 (permalink) Old 04-06-2017, 08:54 AM
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Re: So it's been 2 weeks

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I can't justify it so I won't try. Being Christian doesn't make me perfect. I'm human just like everyone else. What I can say is my biblical studies have shown it's much worse to make a vow to God to do something and then not do than it is to not vow at all.

And no, I'm not worried about going to hell. Having accepted Jesus as my savior guarantees my place in heaven.
So you can sin all you want and you've still got a place in Heaven along with all the serial killers who are given forgiveness right before the fatal injection on death row.

How convenient.
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