So it's been 2 weeks - Page 8 - Talk About Marriage
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post #106 of 141 (permalink) Old 04-06-2017, 10:09 PM
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Re: So it's been 2 weeks

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Originally Posted by stixx View Post
It's been my experience that religious individuals are the most hypocritical group of people on the face of the planet.
Religious people maybe but not Christians. Not the many hundreds who I have known in the last 40 years. They are the nicest, kindest most honest people.

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post #107 of 141 (permalink) Old 04-06-2017, 10:12 PM
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Re: So it's been 2 weeks

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It doesn't really work that way, but a lot of people think it does. There are going to be a lot of very surprised people at the final judgment.
Salvation isn't based on works, but it based one whom we serve. If we serve God, there will be a heart change and our actions will change as well. Someone who lacks self-control is not acting under the power of God. If you are truly interested in this topic, I recommend you read through Matthew, Mark, Luke, John, Romans, Hebrews, and James.
If a person honestly thinks they can act terribly and its ok, because they can be forgiven, I would have to question if they really know Jesus Christ at all.
Repentance means changing and stopping that sin, its far more than just saying sorry.
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post #108 of 141 (permalink) Old 04-07-2017, 02:20 AM Thread Starter
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Re: So it's been 2 weeks

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Mark, what do you like about yourself? What can you brag about? What change have you made to this planet? Time for a gratitude list.
What's the purpose for this list? What will it accomplish?
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post #109 of 141 (permalink) Old 04-07-2017, 06:42 PM
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Re: So it's been 2 weeks

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What's the purpose for this list? What will it accomplish?
I think tunera is suggesting that you focus on your talents and attributes. Focusing on what we like about ourselves can build our confidence and give us a positive self-image.

When you fully embrace your competencies, you'll be confident in who you are. People are drawn to self-confident, positive people.

I refuse to make anyone a priority in my life who considers me nothing more than an option.

You can't start the next chapter of your life if you keep re-reading the last one.
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post #110 of 141 (permalink) Old 04-07-2017, 08:04 PM
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Re: So it's been 2 weeks

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What's the purpose for this list? What will it accomplish?
Hopefully, a change in attitude!

You're stuck in a woe is me mode and people often have a hard time digging out of it. Realizing what you have to be grateful for, what you're proud of, often makes the crappy aspects less important.
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post #111 of 141 (permalink) Old 04-10-2017, 04:25 PM Thread Starter
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Re: So it's been 2 weeks

Today, for work related reasons, I had to visit this girl's place of employment. I was, admittedly, a little nervous knowing this because I wasn't sure if I'd bump into her or not.

So I do what I was there to do and I see her entering the building through the glass as I'm heading towards a different exit. Realizing it was her, I smiled, gave a slight wave, and just kept going. She turned away.

I almost laughed out loud. I go NC but she couldn't look at me? Whatever! Moving on....
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post #112 of 141 (permalink) Old 04-10-2017, 05:51 PM
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Re: So it's been 2 weeks

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Originally Posted by marksaysay View Post
Today, for work related reasons, I had to visit this girl's place of employment. I was, admittedly, a little nervous knowing this because I wasn't sure if I'd bump into her or not.

So I do what I was there to do and I see her entering the building through the glass as I'm heading towards a different exit. Realizing it was her, I smiled, gave a slight wave, and just kept going. She turned away.

I almost laughed out loud. I go NC but she couldn't look at me? Whatever! Moving on....
Good job. Now don't give into the idea of contacting her. Clearly she is not interested and you don't want to pursue anyone who isn't interested in you as well.

For more on my marriage philosophies check out the marriage section of my website:
The Feminine Review

Standard Evidence Thread: http://talkaboutmarriage.com/coping-...ence-post.html
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post #113 of 141 (permalink) Old 04-10-2017, 06:15 PM Thread Starter
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Re: So it's been 2 weeks

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Good job. Now don't give into the idea of contacting her. Clearly she is not interested and you don't want to pursue anyone who isn't interested in you as well.
I wasn't even thinking about interest level. I was thinking more of a maturity level. She almost looked mad. And why would she be mad at me?

Again....OH WELL!!!

Last edited by marksaysay; 04-10-2017 at 06:27 PM.
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post #114 of 141 (permalink) Old 04-10-2017, 06:30 PM
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Re: So it's been 2 weeks

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I wasn't even thinking about interest level. I was thinking more of a maturity level. She almost looked mad. And why would she be mad at me?

Again....OH WELL!!!
It's good that you are starting to view this more objectively.

Have you been thinking about what kind of plan you can make to get out of your current dilemma? If you are in a situation where you feel like you are trapped with no choices, it will weigh on you and you will sink deeper into depression. If you make and implement a plan, your outlook will improve and your mood along with it.

For more on my marriage philosophies check out the marriage section of my website:
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Standard Evidence Thread: http://talkaboutmarriage.com/coping-...ence-post.html
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post #115 of 141 (permalink) Old 04-10-2017, 10:32 PM Thread Starter
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Re: So it's been 2 weeks

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It's good that you are starting to view this more objectively.

Have you been thinking about what kind of plan you can make to get out of your current dilemma? If you are in a situation where you feel like you are trapped with no choices, it will weigh on you and you will sink deeper into depression. If you make and implement a plan, your outlook will improve and your mood along with it.
I'm definitely viewing it quite a bit differently than she is. I guess I kinda just "ghosted" her. And even if I did, I don't really feel bad about it. She strung me along. We're even!

And I won't lie and say I have a plan. I am feeling a little better about myself. I've been attracting quite a bit of attention lately. It may or may not be relevant to the 13 lbs of muscle I've put on. I'm at 175. I didn't weigh that much when I played minor league baseball. Had I put on this weight back then, I might have actually gotten somewhere...lol

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post #116 of 141 (permalink) Old 04-10-2017, 10:46 PM
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Re: So it's been 2 weeks

I'm glad you're feeling better, but I hope you put together a plan to move forward with your life rather than being stuck in a rut that isn't moving you forward.

For more on my marriage philosophies check out the marriage section of my website:
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Standard Evidence Thread: http://talkaboutmarriage.com/coping-...ence-post.html
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post #117 of 141 (permalink) Old 04-11-2017, 02:33 AM
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Re: So it's been 2 weeks

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I'm definitely viewing it quite a bit differently than she is. I guess I kinda just "ghosted" her. And even if I did, I don't really feel bad about it. She strung me along. We're even!

And I won't lie and say I have a plan. I am feeling a little better about myself. I've been attracting quite a bit of attention lately. It may or may not be relevant to the 13 lbs of muscle I've put on. I'm at 175. I didn't weigh that much when I played minor league baseball. Had I put on this weight back then, I might have actually gotten somewhere...lol
Do you really want to attract the sort of women who are only interested in muscles? Remember for us as Christians we need to date another Christian.
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post #118 of 141 (permalink) Old 04-11-2017, 08:11 AM Thread Starter
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Re: So it's been 2 weeks

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Do you really want to attract the sort of women who are only interested in muscles? Remember for us as Christians we need to date another Christian.
This still remains at the top of my list of characteristics. It is an ego boost, though, to start getting looks and comments.
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post #119 of 141 (permalink) Old 04-11-2017, 08:51 AM
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Re: So it's been 2 weeks

I admit that haven't read the whole thread. But, this just jumped out at me....


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I've gone out at times, but the venue choices are not the places a "minister" should frequent, so after a while I feel guilty and stop.
Didn't Christ sit at the table with the sinners? He did. Maybe you are being called to reach out in a similar manner, but your ego compels you to get caught up in the games we play when out in the 'wilderness'. Something about you who live by the Spirit should restore the sinner gently. But watch yourselves, or you also may be tempted.

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OP,
Perhaps you should reevaluate your reason for attending a house of worship. Also, if you are grading your females on outward appearance only then be prepared to have your score averaged out. A woman who is an 8, questionable 9 may be only a 2, questionable 3 in trustworthiness thereby making her overall score a 0 once you have a family and she decides she wants another guy. Be cautious.
I'd also like to add to this insight. How would rate yourself? Are you just going to the gym to become a stronger better you or to just be able to move up a notch in the scale?

Go to the seediest bars if you are called to, go to the gym and get ripped. But the healing process can't possibly begin until you know yourself well enough to know why you are doing these things and then acting. Until then, you're just putting off the 'reckoning'.
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post #120 of 141 (permalink) Old 04-11-2017, 11:17 AM
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Re: So it's been 2 weeks

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Do you really want to attract the sort of women who are only interested in muscles? Remember for us as Christians we need to date another Christian.
lol Just because they are interested in his muscles doesn't mean they are only interested in his muscles. If a man is serious about his faith and has the fruit of the Spirit, adding in some good muscle mass isn't going to hurt him on the attraction scale. Especially where it shows that a man takes good care of himself. I would say that physical condition is an important factor in determining whether someone would make a good mate.

For more on my marriage philosophies check out the marriage section of my website:
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Standard Evidence Thread: http://talkaboutmarriage.com/coping-...ence-post.html
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