Husband is cruel
Married 12 years. My husband and I don't believe in divorce, but I am seriously wondering if that is my only option. He says and does cruel things to me for absolutely no reason. This last 3 weeks he has said/done: Kissing me grosses him out, I am boring so he doesn't want to spend time with me, he's thrown objects at me because he fell asleep on the couch so I woke him up and asked if he wanted to come to bed with me being that it was 1am and he started screaming at me and throwing things at me, refuses to touch me whatsoever (haven't kissed once in months let alone have sex), I approached him and said I was severely depressed and didn't want to live a lot of days and asked if he could please just talk to me, I promised him it had nothing to do with him and I just needed someone to talk to and he said, "I really don't care." This is the short list. When I try to suggest counseling he refuses to go. When I try to talk to him he rolls his eyes and says I need to stop b****ing at him. I practice for days what and how I should say things to ensure it's short and not "complaining" but anything I mention at all is construed as "b****ing" so I ask how else I'm supposed to approach xyz and he says I'm to accept whatever he says and does. I'm so lonely and confused because he flat out says he loves me and doesn't want a divorce but his actions and words say otherwise. I am attractive, I havent gained weight or anything, I'm about 5'2 and 115 pounds. I simply love him and want to make this work but he doesn't think there's a problem or doesn't care if there is one. If I talk to a friend about what's going on he blows up and screams at me, probably because he's embarrassed, so I have no one to turn to and vent to because I'm trying to avoid angering him. Now one of the problems I have with divorce is we have a special needs child that needs round the clock care. It would be physically impossible for me to work a full time job because of our son, I would have no way of supporting myself and he has told me if I left him he would take our kids away from me and gain custody of them to hurt me.. I don't want to risk that because he screams at them all the time if he has to care for them. They are simply terrified of him. I would like to work on things but don't know how if he won't try. What can I do to make this better? Please don't judge me, I can't take it anymore. Please.
Last edited by Calieindie; 04-08-2017 at 10:47 PM.