*Venting* Things are beginning to look up but I have built up anger.
Throughout my marriage me and my husband have had problems like any other couple, but most of our problems from the beginning have all been coming from his family....Mother & Fathers side. Although my husband finally learned to keep his family at a distance and finally cut ties from his sister on his fathers side I still find myself angry. Im not angry so much about what was done to me but I feel like its a buildup of the things i went through. I have a wall up now because of it to the point where I am ready to defend myself much as possible just in case something else comes up. I even expressed this to my husband and told him that I have had it up to here where in the midst of a fight I dont give a damn about getting my ass whooped. Its reasons behind this. I will say this before I break it down...."In laws should stay the hell out of their family members marriage because not all the time is your relative innocent in the matter." Also it pisses anyone off for a family member on the spouses side to come at you or for you when they dont know what the hell their relative has done to you or the **** you been through with them. Its like how dare they!!!!
I dealt with:
His parents, stepfather and bio mom who had baggage from since my husband was born. I stepped into this marriage with my husband still having disputes with his stepfather from when my husband was a child. And on the other he & his moms relationship are affected by him and his stepfathers disagreements. She feels that since this man was around since he was a baby after her abuse that my husband should feel a certain way towards him, but on the other hand my husband doesnt feel as though his step father treated him as one of his own. This situation has caused him and his other two siblings (younger sister & brother) to not get along well.
That situation caused my husband to want to get to know his dad side of the family.
Now with his sister on his moms side. She & her boyfriend moved in with us at a time where me and my husband were fighting alot. He would, of course, never do his dirt around her too much. He did, however, pick fights to make me look a certain way around them because they didnt know at the time that he was seeing someone else and neither did I. AT the same time she was dealing with her boyfriend cheating and would take her car to see other women. While they were there I helped them both find jobs and looked out for them financially when they needed help and was very hospitable towards them. Towards the end when they ended up leaving her boyfriend accused me of telling her that he was seeing another woman, but she had proof because she followed him outside when he left the house to meet with another one. So she saw what was going on with her own eyes. He then accused me of cheating and told my husband. So automatically they took his side. Even though me and him have reconciled for 3yrs now she still treats me as if I done something to her after I have been the bigger person and reached out to her. SHe can have a nasty attitude at times. She likes and compliments her younger brother, who is constantly in trouble, but downs my husband all the time.
Then there was the long lost sister my husband found last year after researching his fathers side of the family. She did not even try to get to know me at all. She lives out of town and she started alot of problems between me and my husband. She was basically trying to get him to leave me and date one of her sisters on her mothers side. It was so bad that at one point my husband would not sleep with me while she visited and asked for a divorce. Its not like she had any proof or evidence that I mistreat him when I dont. He finally cut her off but it damn near took a year for him to see her for what she is.
On top of all that there was cousins who lived with us that we also helped in many ways but they would not help us with bills and so they had to leave. they also was around when the long lost sister came into the picture but they made the situation worst.
I also had to deal with other family members such as cousins with nasty attitudes and smart ass mouths.
Im just venting because someone else or many can relate to me. I was so busy trying to get along with everyone and impress them that I overwhelmed myself. Now im just like freak it. either they like me or they dont, but either way i dont care anymore.