Re: Has your spouse been a good influence on you?
My wife is a terribly negative person, and has been a terribly negative influence on me. I suspect my marriage has taken a few years off of my life. I have, however, learned some important things from the experience and overall, am a better person.
> I learnt how important my dreams are to me.
My wife tried very hard to dissuade me from pursuing my dreams, which put me in a position where I had to fight hard for what I wanted out of life and stay committed to it, in the absence of her emotional support.
> I learnt how to rely on myself more than anyone else.
In the same vein as above, without my wife supporting me on anything, I had to rely on myself for motivation.
> I learnt how to control my temper, and that no one else is to blame for my words or deeds.
For years, my wife and I were in a verbally abusive relationship. We had long arguments that lasted for hours upon hours (sometimes stretched across days), and we screamed and cussed at each other. It was clear that we both needed help, but I have not been able to get my wife to marriage counseling. I finally spoke to a therapist on my own and got the help I needed.
> I learnt what I really need in my marriage.
Being married to a woman who many times is the direct antithesis of what I need, I now have a very clear sense of what I need and why I need it. I'd like to think my present marriage or any future relationship (should my marriage not survive) will benefit from a deeper understanding of my own needs.
> I learnt of my weaknesses, as a man and husband.
Being married to a controlling, selfish woman has put me in many situations where my apathy prevailed over my will to lead. To avoid an argument, I've often given the reins over to my wife and forfeited some leadership responsibilities that in my opinion, men should own in their household.