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post #16 of 59 (permalink) Old 04-14-2017, 10:32 PM
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Re: Wife too close to my brother

You have to set up multiple VARs in the house and one in her car... voice activated recorders that is Gus can give you info regarding cell phones but if you don't nut up and mate guard you are screwed.
Just sayin.

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post #17 of 59 (permalink) Old 04-14-2017, 10:37 PM
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Re: Wife too close to my brother

Talk to your sister in law and have her set up cameras in their house and in yours something stinks here OR just tell her she is taking a polygraph and see her reaction and save some $$$.
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post #18 of 59 (permalink) Old 04-14-2017, 10:39 PM
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Re: Wife too close to my brother

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Originally Posted by jjrr View Post
So my wife and I have been married for 5years now and we have in almost all respects a perfect marriage. A few months ago we moved in a few houses down to my brother (Married) and since then she has been growing extremely close to him. I usually don't get home until a couple of hours after my wife but my brother is so she normally goes over to his place now. They are now pretty much more than friends. They laugh, talk about everything. I get it they both have high powered jobs and similar pressures and interests but now they go out to movies together, have dinner and even when the whole family is together she is quite touchy. I know for sure there is no sexual activity but they do cuddle, hug and hold hands while alone together. They make no secret of how close they are at all. We had a party at my place where and when we all got into the hot tub, my wife got up close to him. My sister in law doesn't seem to care and has made no mention of anything to me. They are also both very happily married but she is away a lot. After the hot tub, my brother asked me if was uncomfortable and if he should stop being friends with my wife. I stupidly played it off cool but it does bother me, a lot. To mitigate this, I asked my wife if we could move to another town in the sense of new town new adventure, I also brought up the possibility of kids but this set her off saying I only care about myself and don't listen to her feelings.
I am feeling more and more pushed aside even though she hasn't changed towards me. I just don't know if I am being over jealous or should I be worried and should I bring it up if yes with which of them.
Ignorance is bliss until it isn't. You don't know what the hell is going on if they are alone together. A pushover gets pushed over.

Your brother and your wife have no respect for you but what's worse is your lack of any common sense boundaries.

You'd better wake the hell up and put your foot down.
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post #19 of 59 (permalink) Old 04-14-2017, 10:44 PM
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post #20 of 59 (permalink) Old 04-14-2017, 11:58 PM
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Re: Wife too close to my brother

It sounds like you are close with your brother. He even raised the issue with you when he asked you if you were uncomfortable. I would raise the issue with him. Ask him if they discuss your marraige? Ask him if they discuss your uncomfort with thier relationship. Tell your brother that this is upsetting you and ask him not to discuss it with your wife. If your wife comes to you after that then you know they discussed it.
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post #21 of 59 (permalink) Old 04-15-2017, 12:59 AM
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Re: Wife too close to my brother

theres more going on than you know i think whats with the holding hand ,cinema and dinner thats called dating in my book you should of called it the first time they had any odd interaction with each other id be going out of my mind and certainly letting wife and brother know this is not only unacceptable its down right weird
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post #22 of 59 (permalink) Old 04-15-2017, 01:23 AM
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Re: Wife too close to my brother

Quote:
Originally Posted by jjrr View Post
So my wife and I have been married for 5years now and we have in almost all respects a perfect marriage. A few months ago we moved in a few houses down to my brother (Married) and since then she has been growing extremely close to him. I usually don't get home until a couple of hours after my wife but my brother is so she normally goes over to his place now. They are now pretty much more than friends. They laugh, talk about everything. I get it they both have high powered jobs and similar pressures and interests but now they go out to movies together, have dinner and even when the whole family is together she is quite touchy. I know for sure there is no sexual activity but they do cuddle, hug and hold hands while alone together. They make no secret of how close they are at all. We had a party at my place where and when we all got into the hot tub, my wife got up close to him. My sister in law doesn't seem to care and has made no mention of anything to me. They are also both very happily married but she is away a lot. After the hot tub, my brother asked me if was uncomfortable and if he should stop being friends with my wife. I stupidly played it off cool but it does bother me, a lot. To mitigate this, I asked my wife if we could move to another town in the sense of new town new adventure, I also brought up the possibility of kids but this set her off saying I only care about myself and don't listen to her feelings.
I am feeling more and more pushed aside even though she hasn't changed towards me. I just don't know if I am being over jealous or should I be worried and should I bring it up if yes with which of them.
They are both behaving totally inappropriately. Talk to your brother and tell him to back off.
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post #23 of 59 (permalink) Old 04-15-2017, 01:26 AM
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Cool Re: Wife too close to my brother

Well, whenever she gets "knocked-up," at least the kid will have some resemblance to your very own, at least per the DNA!

Reckoning that this would make the child, not only your stepchild, but your niece or nephew as well!

So are they going to refer to you as "Daddy" or "Uncle?"

Ain't it simply blissful to keep it all in the family? And the kicker is that most of it's going on right before your very own eyes ~ and you're doing little to nothing about it!

"To love another person is to see the face of God!" - Jean Valjean from Les Miserables

My Story! http://talkaboutmarriage.com/going-t...andonment.html

Last edited by arbitrator; 04-15-2017 at 06:58 AM. Reason: Edification
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post #24 of 59 (permalink) Old 04-15-2017, 01:39 AM
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Cool Re: Wife too close to my brother

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Arb, I think both know.
In total agreement, @Malaise ~ I was only trying to verbally "connect the dots," whereby he could make that gross and apparent realization for himself!

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post #25 of 59 (permalink) Old 04-15-2017, 01:44 AM
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Cool Re: Wife too close to my brother

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Originally Posted by Dan Moloney View Post
theres more going on than you know i think whats with the holding hand ,cinema and dinner thats called dating in my book you should of called it the first time they had any odd interaction with each other id be going out of my mind and certainly letting wife and brother know this is not only unacceptable its down right weird
And by helping the local economy out by using only local motel rooms!


"To love another person is to see the face of God!" - Jean Valjean from Les Miserables

My Story! http://talkaboutmarriage.com/going-t...andonment.html
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post #26 of 59 (permalink) Old 04-15-2017, 03:38 AM
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Re: Wife too close to my brother

Like some of the others here I am trying to get a better understanding of your relationship with your brother.

Are the two of you close ? Is this your older or younger brother ? What is the age difference between the two of you ?


From what you have said there is a very high probability that they do much more than just holding hands when they are alone. This has almost certainly gone physical.


If you want to save your marriage this needs to be stopped and exposed! To your sister in law and to other members of the family. You need to man up and tell your brother to fvck off! And then be prepared to dump your "wife". This is not a marriage and you should thank your lucky stars that you don't have any kids with her yet. And move far far away from your brother - sounds like he is a scumb@g too!

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post #27 of 59 (permalink) Old 04-15-2017, 03:44 AM
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Re: Wife too close to my brother

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Originally Posted by Thomas Quinn View Post
You have to set up multiple VARs in the house and one in her car... voice activated recorders that is Gus can give you info regarding cell phones but if you don't nut up and mate guard you are screwed.
Just sayin.
YES - set up cams and VARs. See if In fact this is as innocent as you think. I would say it isn't - they are CUDDLING!? IN FRONT OF YOU!?
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post #28 of 59 (permalink) Old 04-15-2017, 04:37 AM
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Re: Wife too close to my brother

If they're openly affectionate in public and around family, you're being played for one, giant chump.

"If you deliberately plan on being less than you are capable of being, then I warn you that you'll be unhappy for the rest of your life."

~ Abraham Maslow
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post #29 of 59 (permalink) Old 04-15-2017, 05:24 AM
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Re: Wife too close to my brother

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Originally Posted by jjrr View Post
I know for sure there is no sexual activity but they do cuddle, hug and hold hands while alone together.
Said EVERY betrayed spouse before they found out how wrong they were.
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post #30 of 59 (permalink) Old 04-15-2017, 06:09 AM
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Re: Wife too close to my brother

My brother would be punched in the face............not like we haven't punched eachother before.

And my wife would be out the door!

Your brothers marriage is most likley in the crapper........and so is yours you just don't realise it yet.
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