He says he loves me. Says he has some sort of sex addiction. We hardly ever have sex, in fact, it's been several months since we have been intimate with each other. He claims that having sex with me (or anyone) makes him want it more, and feels that he can't control himself. I am trying so hard to understand where he is coming from, trying to be patient. But I feel like this is just too much for me. These past 2 years he has put an incredible amount of effort into becoming a good father and great friend. But it's not enough for me. I want a husband who loves and desires me.
The LEAST he can do is produce a lie more believable than this
steaming pile of manure. Is there a cheater left
in this world who DOESN'T try to cop to the 'sex addict' excuse? It's just gotten so damned old. And he's such an idiot that he doesn't even know the true description of what a sex addict actually
So his excuse for having no desire for you is that he's afraid to start having sex with you because his "addiction"
will be jump-started and cause him to go crazy wanting more and more sex? How do you keep a straight face
when this fool starts spewing this garbage?
Forgiveness and reconciliation are a GIFT you gave to this cheater. That doesn't mean that YOU have to settle for his lying crumbs or his inability to be intimate with you. He's damned lucky he wasn't thrown out the door and he's ALSO damned lucky you're even willing
to have sex with his worthless ass, because I sure wouldn't touch him if it were me. Instead, he's feeding your pure bull**** because he's no longer attracted to you after his affair.. Don't settle for that.
How can I either move on, or accept this new non-intimate lifestyle? If I move on, how can I possibly justify tearing my otherwise happy family apart? I want to be loved, desired, cared for so badly. But it seems so horribly selfish and all I can seem to think of is how much it will hurt my boys.
Stop falling on the sword for your kids. You gain nothing by being a martyr. There isn't a parent who divorced who didn't feel JUST like you. No one wants to hurt their children or break up the family. So your choices are to stay with a lying cheater who disrespected you with your best friend AND has tried numerous times to cheat on you with others (and probably has
cheated with women you just don't KNOW about) and whose giving you a line of bull**** about why he's not interested in you sexually, or move on to a better life without a serial cheater.
I'd be picking the latter.