Re: My Husband's Best Friend
What's happening here is painfully simple, IMO.
Your husband is not mate-guarding you, which is what you want. He is not doing it because this is his best friend of 25 years and refuses to see what's potentially happening. Or he does see what's happening, and wants to avoid conflict.
The real issue is not Chris, it's your husband. You are constantly being put in an awkward or uncomfortable position, and he is refusing to hear this.
The solution is not all that difficult, I don't think, especially when it comes to the vacation. Tell your husband flat-out that you do not want to go on vacation with this guy. And don't. The next time he's around, go make yourself busy, or make other plans. It's okay to do this, you're within your rights.
My best friend did not like my ex wife, and that was okay. It bothered me a little bit, but that's life. He simply didn't see eye-to-eye with her and she just rubbed him the wrong way. In retrospect, it's entirely possibly my ex wife fancied him, and he, being the good friend, was having none of it. I don't know. I doubt that, but it's possible. More likely, he just saw her for the person she was while I was in the 'love fog'. When we divorced - 14 years later - the first thing he said to me was "Good!"
But it's okay to not like your spouses friend, or for your friend to not like your spouse, or any other combination. You tried (eventually) and now you're here. Your husband should respect this, instead of shrugging it off and insisting on taking vacations with him. He can still spend time with his best friend, without you having to be involved. I did this for 14 years, and it worked out just fine.
"Every time I read your posts about your wife I want to swallow strychnine."