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An interesting perspective on when a partner improves their appearance...

1K views 7 replies 5 participants last post by  MovingForward 
#1 ·
(Two posts in one day... I'm possessed!)

So, I read that one of the first signs to watch out for concerning a cheating partner is the sudden desire to improve their appearance. On one hand, it makes sense, but on the other...

I'm always trying to improve my appearance. My husband HAS asked why I want to lose more weight, get my nails done, etc. Sometimes, I think he thinks I'm doing it for someone else. No. I'm trying to impress my damn self. From a woman's perspective, it really CAN be about wanting to better ourselves...

Anyway, my husband went out last weekend with a friend. I just commented on a thread about clubbing without your spouse and it got me to thinking about my situation. The thing is, I PUSHED him to go out. He hasn't spent time with friends in a long time and the one friend who asked him I like a lot (although he can be a pretty crazy drinker... Serbian, lol) and I just wanted my husband to do SOMETHING with someone other than me. I thought he was going to be out all night, but nope. He came home before midnight. Apparently, him and his friend didn't enjoy the scene. (His friend used to be a CRAZY party guy, but he recently got a Big Boy job and this was his first Saturday off in 6 months.)

So A few days ago my husband says he'd like to try Rogaine. I had to force myself not to laugh because I've been suggesting this for YEARS. My husband has SLIGHTLY thinning hair and I wanted him to tackle it before it became actually thin. I told him it's worth the long term investment and do buy the product monthly. Of course, when I suggested it I was just being a nag, lol.

My guess is he either felt self conscious seeing single men with their luxurious hair on Saturday OR someone (maybe a female he had a thing with in the past, whatever) made a comment. His friend is pretty blunt so he could have said something, too.

In sum, it doesn't bother me that my husband's cameo appearance in the night scene inspired him to take better care of his appearance. (I honestly think this is what sparked his desire to actually do something about his hair.) I'm HAPPY. He's going to be even HOTTER with thicker hair, lol. If it took a night out to make him realize hey, he COULD do something about it then I get to reap the benefits of having a hotter and more confident husband...

That or he's cheating... Do'h!
 
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#3 ·
Just a note, Rogaine may not work for everyone and if his hair is thinning, Propecia is a good option and MUCH easier to administer. Yea, some people report sexual side effects. I'm in year 7 at 57 and no impact. Generic Propecia is available for $6.50 a month at Costco... Still need a prescription of course. My once thinning hair now looks like my cat's fur... Long and white😀
 
#5 ·
I am not one to wear makeup. I never needed to and I did not have the time to do it.

I do colour my hair and get my nails done on occasion but that is it.

I do what little I do because it makes me feel good. I dont do it for others. Never will.


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#7 · (Edited)
He went out, saw young guys and felt old. I wouldn't take it any further than that in my mind. No old flame and no comments from friends, it just suddenly struck him that wow, he HAS changed. It is obvious from him calling it a night early and then immediately talking about Rogaine. He had a little epiphany. It was a tough one because it felt awful, hence he called it a night. Realizing you're no longer in the "young" category is a tough pill to swallow.

I've heard both good and bad things about both Rogaine and Propecia. He needs to hang in there with the Rogaine for a few months to see if it's working, because even if it is, the hair then needs to actually grow. He should stick with one thing at a time in order to be able to figure out what's working and what isn't.

Good on him for trying to do something to make himself more attractive. I'm sure he expects you to try to look your personal best, too. I don't mean all dolled up every day. I just mean your personal best. I don't think it has to be "for himself" either, even though ultimately feeling good, even if via being attractive is for ourselves. I don't see a single thing wrong with wanting to look attractive to one's SO.
 
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