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Originally Posted by zilbup She was more sexually active in the begining of the relationship. But now we may go a month or more without sex. Also we are both fairly young, I am 29 she is 32. |
You can rule out the molestation as the cause of your current sexless marriage.
She may very well be uncomfortable around the issue of sex due to her past, but dont use it as a cop-out. You have historical evidence on your side.
You cant force her to have sex... well you can.... but really you cant change her. Only yourself. Im not a woman, but a man, so maybe this will mean more coming from me. You have to understand that its very likely that you arent giving her the affection she requires in order to become sexual with her. For a lot of women, foreplay is an all day affair that doesnt require physical intimacy.
As a rule of thumb in my marriage, signs of affection from me, are returned sexually by my wife. This isnt an agreement, but a dynamic I have noticed.
You need to take note of what goes on in your relationship. Its astonishing how many people spend soooo bloody much time upgrading their schooling, or taking new courses for work, or learning about the affects of consuming alcohol with simple carbohydrates... But we, as a society dont put this typf of effort into our initmate relationships... And thats why we fail.