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post #16 of 90 (permalink) Old 06-14-2017, 07:00 PM
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Re: He looks at me quite a lot?

Think of other things as much as you can. Let him pursue.

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post #17 of 90 (permalink) Old 06-14-2017, 07:07 PM
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Re: He looks at me quite a lot?

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Originally Posted by TheTruthHurts View Post
Except all the girls I know won't directly ask a guy out. I've polled all of my nieces and many other young women.
Would you mind sharing what country you live in? This could make a difference on what is acceptable for you to approach him.

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post #18 of 90 (permalink) Old 06-14-2017, 07:21 PM
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Re: He looks at me quite a lot?

I know. Its just so unfortunate. The cost of asking is so low, and the potential benefit is so high.

My belief is that there are a lot of very nice shy people out there. They are unattached because of their shyness.

I don't know why people are so strongly socialized against just asking someone.




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Except all the girls I know won't directly ask a guy out. I've polled all of my nieces and many other young women.


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post #19 of 90 (permalink) Old 06-14-2017, 07:35 PM
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Re: He looks at me quite a lot?

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I know. Its just so unfortunate. The cost of asking is so low, and the potential benefit is so high.

My belief is that there are a lot of very nice shy people out there. They are unattached because of their shyness.

I don't know why people are so strongly socialized against just asking someone.
isabelseyler seems to also be very shy. This is what happens when two people are shy.

I also get the impression that isabelseyler is from a very conservative culture that would frown on a woman approaching man. isabelseyler can correct me on this if I'm wrong. But social pressure is very strong against women being forward in some cultures.

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post #20 of 90 (permalink) Old 06-14-2017, 07:37 PM
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Re: Does he like me? how to approach him?

Lisa,

Since you seem too shy to approach him, maybe you could use an old fashion ploy. Walk near where he is and 'accidently' drop all you books. If he's interested in you he will most likely help you pick them up. Then you can just start talking to him and the ice will be broken.

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post #21 of 90 (permalink) Old 06-14-2017, 08:01 PM
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Re: He looks at me quite a lot?

Quote:
Originally Posted by uhtred View Post
I know. Its just so unfortunate. The cost of asking is so low, and the potential benefit is so high.

My belief is that there are a lot of very nice shy people out there. They are unattached because of their shyness.

I don't know why people are so strongly socialized against just asking someone.
I don't think it's socialization as much as innate fear of rejection.
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post #22 of 90 (permalink) Old 06-15-2017, 12:35 AM Thread Starter
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Quote:
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TheTruthHurts View Post
Except all the girls I know won't directly ask a guy out. I've polled all of my nieces and many other young women.
Would you mind sharing what country you live in? This could make a difference on what is acceptable for you to approach him.

I am currently living in Manchester. I am Italian and I think he's either Canadian or American because he's accent isnt British. He doesn't sound British but I maybe wrong since English people speak in a variety of different accents

Last edited by isabelseyler; 06-15-2017 at 12:41 AM.
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post #23 of 90 (permalink) Old 06-15-2017, 12:39 AM Thread Starter
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He's obviously attracted to you.

You've smiled back, which should be all the encouragement he needs.

The fact that he hasn't approached you yet, given that you're obviously both attracted to each other is a bit spooky. Not in a weird way, just in a way that makes me think he lacks confidence, which is not generally attractive in a man.

The longer the glances and smiles go on without actual contact, the less likely contact is or if it happens, the more likely it is to be painfully awkward.

You may need to initiate. Next time you're out in the quad, have a cup of coffee in one hand. Approach him, hand him one of the cups and say "My name's Isabel. Let's chat." Take a sip from your cup to give him a chance to gather himself, and see how he responds.
Hey hi. I just wanted to clarify that I haven't smiled back at him. He's always looking so seriously at me that I have been unable to smile. Especially yesterday. He gave me such a piercing look that I lost all courage to smile at him.
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post #24 of 90 (permalink) Old 06-15-2017, 12:48 AM Thread Starter
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Re: Does he like me? how to approach him?

I am not sure if this could be one of the reasons he feels shy to approach but I am 25 by age but nearly everyone here says I look much younger than my age. A classmate even said she thought I was a teenager and she did not expect me to be 25. Could it be that he also thinks that way and thinks I am too young (when I am not) so he is having trouble to talk?
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post #25 of 90 (permalink) Old 06-15-2017, 01:00 AM
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Re: Does he like me? how to approach him?

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I am not sure if this could be one of the reasons he feels shy to approach but I am 25 by age but nearly everyone here says I look much younger than my age. A classmate even said she thought I was a teenager and she did not expect me to be 25. Could it be that he also thinks that way and thinks I am too young (when I am not) so he is having trouble to talk?


Yes. SMILE damn it!


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post #26 of 90 (permalink) Old 06-15-2017, 01:15 AM
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Re: Does he like me? how to approach him?

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hi guys... So I need some advice here. Posted this in GD (everyone is looking) but nobody is responding.
A university is a great place to meet people... If you want to engage him more, there's lots of topics. Reasons to meet, likewise. Places to go... You get the idea.

The intense look? Is he into the liberal arts? Humanities? We soft science / liberal arts types were always on the aloof side, compared with engineering or hard science types...
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post #27 of 90 (permalink) Old 06-15-2017, 01:24 AM Thread Starter
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Re: Does he like me? how to approach him?

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A university is a great place to meet people... If you want to engage him more, there's lots of topics. Reasons to meet, likewise. Places to go... You get the idea.

The intense look? Is he into the liberal arts? Humanities? We soft science / liberal arts types were always on the aloof side, compared with engineering or hard science types...
from what I have perceived, he seems very politically charged and he's extremely into activism so I think he's into social sciences/humanities like political studies..
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post #28 of 90 (permalink) Old 06-15-2017, 04:47 AM
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Cool Re: Does he like me? how to approach him?

Simply smile, @isabelseyler ~ then ask him, calling him by his first name, "Hey _______, do you like what you're seeing, as much as I like what I see?" and then ask him if he's available for coffee or lunch!

I cannot help but believe that he'd be absolutely flattered by such a gesture!

You'll never really know until you try!

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Last edited by arbitrator; 06-15-2017 at 06:57 AM. Reason: Edification
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post #29 of 90 (permalink) Old 06-15-2017, 06:00 AM
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Re: Does he like me? how to approach him?

Just a thought. Do you really want a guy who is too shy and not confident to ask you out?

you gave him eyes and he gave you eyes now if hes worth his weight in salt he will ask you out.
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post #30 of 90 (permalink) Old 06-15-2017, 06:09 AM
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This is 2017 not 1817. Walk up to him,say hello and ask him would he like to get a coffee or go for a drink with you. The worst that can happen is he says no,then you are exactly where you are now except you know where you stand.
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