Originally Posted by youngnmarried16 View Post
Every marriage has the little lies I assume because no one is perfect. I just don't understand why lies have to continue. It's like I can't receive the truth anymore. My husband tells stories to make himself look good I guess but why? I know more about him through his family than him. I just don't understand why he has to lie about so much! I have been very frustrated for the past 3 days because our home keys have gone missing and I know that I left mines at home because I was the only one going to work that day. I left them on the bed and I usually come home to put them on the key ring. So all of a sudden I can take find my keys. He lost his keys as well but I find out from the neighbor in our apartment building that he left his keys on the porch. So for 3 days he has been lying about the keys having to be somewhere in the home. I have his set and still mines are just nowhere to be found. It's so exhausting having to be the only responsible one it seems. I feel that once he lost his keys he found mine and then lost those as well. Why won't he just tell me? It's not like I'm going to divorce him for it! I just wanted to rant guys thanks so much I would love to hear from you guys.
I've been married to a chronic liar for 25 years and I can tell you that unless something changes now this isn't going to turn out well. I don't know your spouses motivation for lying but I can tell you that if it's something that a good long talk can't sort out you need to take steps to stop this in its tracks now. If this is something that goes deep this can and will cause so much damage over time.
My hubs was telling stories from day one I just wasn't aware of it in the beginning. When it began to become apparent I was to embarrassed by him to call him out. Most of his lies leave me scratching my head, they don't produce any gain for him. There's nothing but risk involved for lying about the stupidest things. Why risk making an absolute fool of yourself over something so dumb?
Example....I needed scissors one day here at home but they had been missing for days. I figured one of the kids lost them again. I had been mentioning the lost scissors to hubs for days telling him if he finds them to let me know. They're usually kept in a small junk drawer in the kitchen. On this particular day I looked through the drawer again, still no scissors. Hubs was sitting in the dining room watching me go through the house looking for them, again. As I began heading upstairs to look in the bedrooms I heard him get up and go out onto the back porch where he keeps all his tools and fishing gear. The back porch is off our kitchen. I knew at that point where the scissors were. I froze on the stairs and listened. He quietly came back in. Already knowing what was about to happen I walk back in the kitchen and there he is standing with his hand on the junk drawer and soon as he sees me he pulls the drawer open and lifts the scissors out saying that I obviously missed seeing them in the drawer. After 25 years he still doesn't get that I know all his tricks. I stood there silent and just shook my head and after several silent seconds said "No hubs". He knew by the tone of my voice that he was busted. He didn't say a word and then walked away.
If this had happened 15 years ago I would have walked into the kitchen thinking that I had truly missed seeing them and he would have then launched into a speech about how my absent mindedness caused to much stress for everyone in the house and would have gone on about how I had b****ed out everyone over a lost pair of scissors that were never lost.
Just be careful because liars can hone their craft over time and make life hell. Talk with your spouse now, call him or her out, keep the issue out in the open....don't let it slide.