02-07-2012, 12:04 PM
Join Date: Feb 2012
| | Re: Need to get the spark back
I might not be the best person to give advice as I am in a similar situation, needing to get the spark back in my marraige.
I think we all hit times in our marraige where we become especially vulnerable to outside influences. When the connection in our marraige is weak, we have to be careful not to allow that connection to spark elsewhere in our lives. I personally do not leave myself open for close relationships with the opposite sex for this reason - however, I know that is an extreme stance to take. You definitely need to cut back the contact you have with this other woman at work. Ask yourself - if you and your wife were at your happiest right now, would she seem so appealing to you? Do you think you would still have that connection with her, or even give her a second glance? I'd reason to guess, probably not. Try to realize it is the absence in your life making her seem appealing to you right now.
Have you ever actually talked to your wife about your feelings? I would guess that if you are feeling this way, she is also sharing some of the same feelings. She may not be focused on sex, but I can assure you that she is not blind to the fact that things have cooled off and that you are amiss. How do you know unless you talk to her?
FWIW, I am a woman and I would give ANYTHING for my husband to talk to me when he is feeling like you are feeling. There is nothing to be offended about or angry about - you are just stating facts and asking to get things back on track. IMO, that is very admirable.