Did he ever really love me?
 Talk About Marriage
  The Marriage Advice and Relationship Help Forums
  right
Forums - For Therapists - Link to Us - Advertise  

    A Public Forum Provided by The Family & Marriage Counseling Directory
Register FAQ Community Search Today's Posts Mark Forums Read

General Relationship Discussion Although anyone can post anywhere on Talk About Marriage, this section is for people interested in general relationship and marriage advice.

Closed Thread
 
LinkBack Thread Tools Search this Thread
Old 02-25-2009, 09:43 PM   #1 (permalink)
Registered User
 
Join Date: Feb 2009
Posts: 9
Default Did he ever really love me?

My parents introduced me to a man who is divorced with one kid. I am also divorced. My mom gave me his number and I called him. After that we talked on the phone everyday for hours sometimes. After a month of talking on the phone he came to visit me( he lives out of town, he's a truck driver) and we had a good time together. I couple of weeks after that he picked me up and I rode with him on his truck. We of course had sex and I started to fall in love with him. I thought he felt the same way. A couple of things bothered me though, he had his ex-wife's name still tattooed on his neck and he still had a pet name for her stored in his cell-phone. Other than that I thought things were going good and I thought I might marry him one day. Two weeks after being on his truck I got off and the next day he called me saying that he didn't wanna talk to me again. I was so confused cuz i thought he really loved me. A week later I found out that he had contacted his ex-wife and reconciled with her after he dumped me. I am so confused because we talked on the phone everyday for hours, the sex was good, he kisses were good, he came to visit me, and he even let me ride on his truck. I know for a fact that he hadn't been talking to his ex wife while i was on the truck. So what happned? Did he ever love me the way I loved him?
confusedgirl86 is offline   Quick reply to this message
Sponsored Links
Advertisement
 
Old 02-25-2009, 10:09 PM   #2 (permalink)
Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2008
Posts: 388
Default Re: Did he ever really love me?

i doubt he loved you. it sounds like you were just a fling until he decided to go back to his wife. forget him and go find someone who'll treat you better
wonder is offline   Quick reply to this message
Old 02-25-2009, 10:20 PM   #3 (permalink)
Registered User
 
Join Date: Feb 2009
Posts: 9
Default Re: Did he ever really love me?

I just don't understand. We talked on the phone for hours everyday and he didn't even talk to her. Why would he do that? Why would he kiss me the way he did if he didn't love me? Why did he ignore his ex-wife's phone calls when I was with him? Why did he let me ride on his truck for two weeks?
confusedgirl86 is offline   Quick reply to this message
Old 02-25-2009, 11:28 PM   #4 (permalink)
Member
 
Blanca's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2008
Posts: 4,042
Default Re: Did he ever really love me?

as hard as it is to hear you were probably a rebound. he may be back, though, so i just hope you learn and never go back to him.
__________________
"I'm a lover of what is, not because I'm a spiritual person, but because it hurts when I argue with reality."
- Bryon Katie
Blanca is offline   Quick reply to this message
Old 02-26-2009, 03:42 AM   #5 (permalink)
Registered User
 
Join Date: Feb 2009
Posts: 15
Default Re: Did he ever really love me?

Remember that he also has a history with his ex AND a kid. Kids a big part why people stay together.

Your obviously upset and want to understand why.
Sometimes being with another person can make him miss his wife and remember what he had with her. It sounds like its probably not anything YOU did but just more with what is going on with his life.
These things happen, people have mixed feelings and its hard to sort out. At least he told you instead of just not calling.

Sometimes its just not meant to be. Hang in there.
Kyle is offline   Quick reply to this message
Old 02-26-2009, 08:11 AM   #6 (permalink)
Registered User
 
Join Date: Feb 2009
Posts: 9
Default Re: Did he ever really love me?

When he called me he said that he was deeply in love with his wife. If that is true how could he have sex with and spend time with me? He most not have loved her that much.
confusedgirl86 is offline   Quick reply to this message
Old 02-26-2009, 09:22 AM   #7 (permalink)
Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2008
Posts: 323
Default Re: Did he ever really love me?

People can have sex with people and not be in love with them.

He was obviously attracted to you. But it doesn't mean he loved you. I'm sorry, I know it's hard to hear. But I think it will help you to realize that.
MsLady is offline   Quick reply to this message
Old 02-26-2009, 09:26 AM   #8 (permalink)
Registered User
 
StillStanding's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: South Carolina
Posts: 29
Default Re: Did he ever really love me?

Im am deeply sorry that you are hurting in all of this.

Sadly, I have to agree with the everyone else whom has posted a response. You mentioned that you fell in love with him, but never that he fell in love with you. Truck driving is somewhat of a lonely business and that on top of dealing with divorce is probably the reason he allowed you to ride with him for two weeks.
As far as how he he could spend time with you and have sex with you, yet be deeply in love with his life; sometimes it takes people making choices that may not be appropiate in order for them to realize what they truly want. Its not right, but does tend to happen more often than not.
Again as previously mentioned by someone else, dont take what has happened as something is wrong with you, or that you arent loveable, its not the case.
Somewhere in the back of his mind there was the hope of reconciliation of his marriage. It didnt come when he expected to, but it did come. Treasure the time you spent together, but dont harp on it. Obviously there is something better coming your way, so free your mind of this situation so that you dont miss your next opprotunity.
Take everything one day at time, it will get better.
StillStanding is offline   Quick reply to this message
Old 02-26-2009, 09:40 AM   #9 (permalink)
Registered User
 
Join Date: Feb 2009
Posts: 9
Default Re: Did he ever really love me?

This situation is making me crazy. I contacted his ex-wife and told her about myself because she didn't know about me. I told her that I am pregnant with his baby, although i am not. I also told her that he bought me a ring, and even showed her "receipts". I stole a money order from his truck and sent a picture to his ex- wife and told her that he had been sending me money. I told her that I broke up with him and that he came crying begging me to come back. I told her that him and I had been together while they were married. I just couldn't help myself.
confusedgirl86 is offline   Quick reply to this message
Old 02-26-2009, 10:20 AM   #10 (permalink)
Registered User
 
StillStanding's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: South Carolina
Posts: 29
Default Re: Did he ever really love me?

Quote:
Originally Posted by confusedgirl86 View Post
This situation is making me crazy. I contacted his ex-wife and told her about myself because she didn't know about me. I told her that I am pregnant with his baby, although i am not. I also told her that he bought me a ring, and even showed her "receipts". I stole a money order from his truck and sent a picture to his ex- wife and told her that he had been sending me money. I told her that I broke up with him and that he came crying begging me to come back. I told her that him and I had been together while they were married. I just couldn't help myself.
WHAT??? Please tell me you are joking.

If you did any of this thinking that she will leave him and he will come back to you, you are sadly mistaken. You have officially put yourself in the "crazy -----" category only solidifying his choice to return to his wife.

Dont be surprised if you are served with a restraing order or a no contact order anytime soon. You have taken this situation to an entirely different level.
StillStanding is offline   Quick reply to this message
Old 02-26-2009, 10:36 AM   #11 (permalink)
Registered User
 
Join Date: Feb 2009
Posts: 9
Default Re: Did he ever really love me?

He told her that I was lying and she believes him over me! She is still with him although I keep the picture of us together on my Myspace page so that it will make her mad. And she is still with him! She's asked me to take the pic down, but I refuse.

I've been looking on her myspace page and he spent time with her on his birthday, Valentine's day, had flowers delivered to her. He even bought her a new ring!
confusedgirl86 is offline   Quick reply to this message
Old 02-26-2009, 10:58 AM   #12 (permalink)
Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2009
Posts: 699
Default Re: Did he ever really love me?

Quote:
Originally Posted by confusedgirl86 View Post
This situation is making me crazy. I contacted his ex-wife and told her about myself because she didn't know about me. I told her that I am pregnant with his baby, although i am not. I also told her that he bought me a ring, and even showed her "receipts". I stole a money order from his truck and sent a picture to his ex- wife and told her that he had been sending me money. I told her that I broke up with him and that he came crying begging me to come back. I told her that him and I had been together while they were married. I just couldn't help myself.

Oh my, you just crossed over from distraught/confused rebound fling to crazy stalker.

I'm sorry, but everything you just described reaks of crazy/insane/stalker type material. You should get away from this situation and work on your emotional attachment to him and then move on.

That's just plain crazy if you really did all that stuff, and I'm trying to hold back and not be mean.
revitalizedhusband is offline   Quick reply to this message
Old 02-26-2009, 11:33 AM   #13 (permalink)
Registered User
 
Join Date: Feb 2009
Posts: 9
Default Re: Did he ever really love me?

hey now, i don't think that i'm crazy. I'm just giving him what he deserves.
confusedgirl86 is offline   Quick reply to this message
Old 02-26-2009, 12:04 PM   #14 (permalink)
Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2009
Posts: 699
Default Re: Did he ever really love me?

Quote:
Originally Posted by confusedgirl86 View Post
hey now, i don't think that i'm crazy. I'm just giving him what he deserves.

Step out of the situation for a minute and look at what you've admitted to doing already.

You called up his wife and lied saying you were pregnant with his kid.

You called up his wife and lied saying you were with him while they were still together.

You stole something out of his car and used it as "proof" that he is sending you money.

You lied and said you broke up with him and he's begging for you to come back.

You know he's back with his wife but you keep a picture of you two together up on your myspace JUST because you know it pisses her off.

You lied and said he bought you a ring aka that you two were engaged.

You are also checking up on her on HER myspace which has nothing to do you with you.


I'm sorry sweety, but that is crazy stalker %*@*@ material, whether you want to admit it or not.
revitalizedhusband is offline   Quick reply to this message
Old 02-26-2009, 12:30 PM   #15 (permalink)
Registered User
 
Join Date: Feb 2009
Posts: 9
Default Re: Did he ever really love me?

I am not a faker. Here is my myspace link Nichole | MySpace.com
confusedgirl86 is offline   Quick reply to this message
Sponsored Links
Advertisement
 
Closed Thread

Quick Reply
Message:
Options

Register Now

In order to be able to post messages on Talk About Marriage, you must first register. Please enter your desired user name, your email address and other required details in the form below.

Important! Your username will be visible to the public next to anything you post and could show up in search engines like Google. If you are concerned about anonymity, PLEASE choose a username that will not be recognizable to anyone you know.
User Name:
Password
Please enter a password for your user account. Note that passwords are case-sensitive.
Password:
Confirm Password:
Email Address
Please enter a valid email address for yourself.
Email Address:

Log-in

Human Verification

In order to verify that you are a human and not a spam bot, please enter the answer into the following box below based on the instructions contained in the graphic.



Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search

Posting Rules
You may post new threads
You may post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
i was never in love with my wife but i thought love is not that important for living shazil The Ladies' Lounge 41 12-01-2013 08:11 AM
Husband loves me...but doesn't love love me??? YoungLoveHelp General Relationship Discussion 5 10-08-2011 03:45 PM

Member Area

Find a Therapist:


Sponsor Ads


Sponsor Ads




Get The Family & Marriage Counseling Directory Help Guide via Email:
Name:
Email:




All times are GMT -5. The time now is 01:59 PM.



Copyright 2007 - 2013 © Talk About Marriage

SEO by vBSEO 3.6.0 PL2 ©2011, Crawlability, Inc.