General Relationship DiscussionAlthough anyone can post anywhere on Talk About Marriage, this section is for people interested in general relationship and marriage advice.
Well I know it does. It just seems like a lot of work to cover something that isn't illegal (while cheaters suck, as far as I know it isn't something you get prison time for) with something that is horrible and completely illegal (false police reports and slandering an innocent person).
Its not a lot of work and people frame other people all the time to make themselves appear to be innocent.
You'd rather believe she's been raped than cheating with this guy but it doesn't seem like that's how it went down.
I`m still not seeing how she got into a situation with him where there was enough privacy to rape her.
He raped her twice before and was abusive, why would she even answer a text from him?
Its not a lot of work and people frame other people all the time to make themselves appear to be innocent.
And people have crimes commited against them every single day and the victims aren't liars or inventing things. Happens all the time. Hopefully, if this guy is guilty, they have enough real evidence to throw his pathetic ass in prison. If she's lying, and they can prove that, she'll spend some time in jail for it.
I`m still not seeing how she got into a situation with him where there was enough privacy to rape her.
He raped her twice before and was abusive, why would she even answer a text from him?
I`m not getting it.
Did he stalk her and assault her or what?
She got together with him, they were in a car or a hotel, or maybe at his place, they had sex, it all came out, and now she says she did it against her will.
Or something like that.
Quote:
Originally Posted by ScaredandUnsure
If she's lying, and they can prove that, she'll spend some time in jail for it.
Unless there's a video of the act, they can never prove she's lying-only that her story isn't credible.
And people have crimes commited against them every single day and the victims aren't liars or inventing things. Happens all the time. Hopefully, if this guy is guilty, they have enough real evidence to throw his pathetic ass in prison. If she's lying, and they can prove that, she'll spend some time in jail for it.
It is unlikely they will prove her to be lying. It will be his word against hers. She will not be charged with anything. They will not set a precedent like this.
It is unlikely they will prove her to be lying. It will be his word against hers. She will not be charged with anything. They will not set a precedent like this.
Right.
But certain indisputable facts will come out during the questioning.
I'll bet my A$$ that "how and where they met for the purported rape" will not be anything along the lines of him stalking her, dragging her into his car, or that sort of thing.
It was a voluntary meeting, one of many.
He'll probably provide documentation of the many times they met up with each other to show it was consensual.
She'll deny, deny, deny but it's going to be obvious that she was with him of her own free will even if the actual sex act cannot be dissected to complete accuracy.
So if her rape kit came back with tears consistant with that of rape, fluids, etc, that should be scrapped because there is no video of a rape? I don't understand, do you not believe that rapes ever happen?
So if her rape kit came back with tears consistant with that of rape, fluids, etc, that should be scrapped because there is no video of a rape? I don't understand, do you not believe that rapes ever happen?
Based on the information provided in this thread, the rape kit will most likely show results consistent with his semen.
This only proves sex happened, not forcable sex.
I believe rapes happen.
I also believe that women sometimes regret having sex and turn the tables on their sex partner and accuse them of something they didn't do, for example if the sex was an extramarital affair and she's in the hotseat and is trying to shift the blame.
There does not have to be any evidence of forced sex to be rape. There may be. As they say no means no.
But it becomes hard to prove of course. If she met him somewhere that will be weighed. Her meeting him somewhere does not give him the right to rape her. BUT it looks very suspicious. She could have been having an affair with him and it still could be rape. Husbands can be found guilty of rape.
There does not have to be any evidence of forced sex to be rape. There may be. As they say no means no.
But it becomes hard to prove of course. If she met him somewhere that will be weighed. Her meeting him somewhere does not give him the right to rape her. BUT it looks very suspicious. She could have been having an affair with him and it still could be rape. Husbands can be found guilty of rape.
Exactly.
Which is why the rape kit results are not important. I think it can be generally agreed there WAS sex.
Which is why all the details of how and where and how often they met are not all that important.
It all plays a role but it comes down to "he said, she said".
And even if the guy "gets off", the person who started this thread may just come to their own conclusion of exactly who "got off" and deal with her on his own terms.
I'm sure if it comes out that there were many clandestine meetings, and that it happened, say, in his home or in a hotel, he won't feel quite the same way about her "being stalked and forced into having sex".
There does not have to be any evidence of forced sex to be rape. There may be. As they say no means no.
But it becomes hard to prove of course. If she met him somewhere that will be weighed. Her meeting him somewhere does not give him the right to rape her. BUT it looks very suspicious. She could have been having an affair with him and it still could be rape. Husbands can be found guilty of rape.
I'll just wait for the OP to come back and explain what happened. He wasn't real clear on any of it.
I dont have all the details I am still in the dark about alot of it here's what I know, according to what she told the cops in the original report and what she told them today she answered the text originally not knowing who it was when she found out she told him to leave her alone(this can be proven through the saved messages on her phone) she then wen to a mutual friends of both of theirs and he was there. The friend left to go to the store and left them alone when she tried to leave also he then forced him self on her. it all seems fishy I know and i dont know if i fully believe it but i love my wife and want to work through this and will stand by her side