cory275

my hubs and i have been married almost 2 years, and last week out of nowhere he suggests I get lipo. and he did it very sweetly saying i would feel so much better about myself - which is true. but i cant help but think he has some issues with my body. i am full figured woman - im 5 5" and 280lbs.. but i have always been this size. i was this size when my hubs met me, dated me, and married me. i've never met his parents... maybe he's preparing me for them?

i dunno should I just do it and say "thank you"?

PBear

Doing liposuction without correcting the behaviors and issues that caused you to gain the weight in the first place seems pretty pointless to me. not judging, just giving my thoughts.

C
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cory275

not the point, pbear. I'm doing it.. i just wanted an outside opinion on whether or not to discuss my inner thoughts about his intentions with my hubs...

mrsamazing

I know this will sound rude, but by your description of yourself you are more a candidate for lap band than lipo. Lipo is not for weight loss. And yes, talk to your husband.
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NextTimeAround

I read in the NYTimes that when a lipo patient gains weight it goes to another part of the body.

My father did lipo. His stomach looked wierd afterwards and he gained the weight. So he had this big belly that greeted you 2 feet but the rest of him was there. HE finally got rid of it by changing his eating and excercise habits.

ShawnD

For starters, full figured doesn't mean what a lot of people think it means. Full figured is when someone is fat but still has a very feminine shape, usually hourglass shaped. Full figured does not apply if a person has lost that feminine shape.


No, you shouldn't. You should definitely lose weight, but getting lipo will cause a lot of new problems
1) you are agreeing that he has a say over your body
2) lipo is really damn expensive
3) lipo doesn't fix what made you fat in the first place

If you don't stand your ground right now, where will it end? Can he also suggest implants and face lifts? You need to say no.
Even if you said yes, it won't do much good. If you're fat because you love food and hate exercise, then you'll just get fat again a year later. I've gained about 10 pounds in less than a month since I started taking a certain medication, so it's not like it's hard to put on extra weight when food consumption greatly exceeds dietary needs. You could easily pack on another 50 pounds per year until you're right back to where you started.

If you're serious about weight loss, you can ask your doctor for medication to help you slim down. Some doctors will give people Dexedrine or Adderall to lose weight since both are amphetamines. They give a person lots of energy and they drive appetite down.

Jeff/BC

In general, I'm pretty sure that for me, EVERY time is the right time to discuss my inner thoughts with Carol. The alternative would be an emotionally distant marriage that would not work for me.

Unhappy2011

If it helps you come to better terms with it.

Fat is literally a superficial layer on the body. It's the storage of calories(energy) consumed but not metabolized.

It's not who you are on the inside.

cory275

i've already had a consultation with the dr, and I have realistic expectations. the expectations are to remove the "bulk" of the fat in my tummy area. i have absolutely no desire to look like a stick with nothing to hold on to. my hubs told me if i mess with the size of my boobs or ass he'd be dissapointed.

my mom had gastric bypass in the 90s before it was so trendy, but it's about a $20,000 difference between the cost if lipo vs gastric bypass.

nobody can tell the furture, and who's to say that lipo wouldnt kick start a lifestyle change. i'm not gonna pay 6 grand for nothing. and im not convinced that your mate shouldnt have a say on your body to an extent. helpful suggestions to improve yourself should be appreciated especially when they're coming from a good place like being worried about your health. if my hubs didnt let me shave him i wouldnt give those areas as much attention, so we both win.

im not convinced that not sharing these thoughts with my hubs would create "emotionl distance"... i have a lot of thoughts that i keep to myself... talking about feelings all day would drive me nuts.. he's his own person and he's allowed his own opinon wthout my judgement. we're big fans of "pick your battles"... we dont bicker much because we think about whether or not its really worth it to begin with. in this case.. my hubs is a cheap mofo.. and this would be the 3rd large purchase he's made just for me in our 2 years. he's being very generous... and to accuse him of having a selfish motivation for suggesting i do this could be insulting.

Dollystanford

to spend all this money on a quick fix and potentially dangerous solution isn't such a great idea I think - people die having this procedure, particularly is surgery is a much higher risk for larger people

he would be better off spending the money on a gym membership or a personal trainer or anything that helps you get some weight off the natural way

I do have a concern that he is specifying which bits of you he wants to 'slim down' - that sounds pretty controlling to me, it's not the same as shaving someone. It's major surgery

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Unhappy2011

And here comes the animosity towards thin people.

cory275

its not animosity at all... people work really hard for that body type.. its just not attractive to me.. i know lots of people dont like my body type... i'd take gerard butler over adam brody any day... gimme some meat!

Mavash.

There are no quick fixes.

FirstYearDown

Why does your husband suddenly want you to get lipo, when you are the same size as when you met and married? Is there a reason why you have not met his parents? This whole situation is very strange.

The aforementioned diet pills are HIGHLY addictive.

cory275

the reason that he tells me he wants me to get lipo is so that i will feel better about myself... i dont know what made him think of it so suddenly.. thats why i was curious about his motivations..

i've never met his parents because they live in asia... the situation with his family is complicated because they dont know we're married yet.