Emotionally tortured, please help me!

000v · 05-05-2012, 06:37 AM

I have married for 1.5. we have sex once a week but he masturbates everyday, in the shower with his phone, n every possible chance am away from the house he masturbates using his laptop. I don't care what he does it just makes me really ANGRY. We even talked about it and now HE HIDES AND DOES IT. He hates smooching, being touched, he gets annoyed if he is being kissed on his neck, nibbled on his ears, and he also hates it when i touch him on his ass or his penis... ALL he likes is powder, soap, oil, undershirts, cell phone, laptop where he watches porn on spanish tube, mom and son, belly dancing, burlesque, bikni videos, hamster PRON website, youtube dirty videos, and all nasty videos, and websites. I feel sickening just seeing all of it and think that am not good enough for him, that i am a burden on him by living in his house, feel like killing myself or running away. he should have just married his cell phone and laptop, its so bloody annoying to just have all this affection and there is none from the other side. Yes, I understand a man works hards he comes back home and wants to relax and watch tv then why the ****kkk does he gets married. I HATE IT ALL! Every time he masturbates, either he is super lovey to me may be because he is guilty i donno, or he becomes one nasty jerk. He talks arrogantly, SWEARS LIKE A FIRE CRACKER, HE shows no EMOTIONS at alllllllll expect when am sick or special occasion, or when we are with ppl. I AM SO ANNOYED, so confused... what should I DO? and after all that in very rare occasions he says that he loves me, i do to but its FADING and he is causing it [/B][/SIZE]