General Relationship DiscussionAlthough anyone can post anywhere on Talk About Marriage, this section is for people interested in general relationship and marriage advice.
So you supported her and her children. She has pursued a career that quite frankly could have meant a better life for you both, but intends to leave the marriage.
This is consistent with a walk away wife who set out on an exit strategy. It is also consistent with a wife who got involved with a different goup of folks who she considers higher up the socio-econmic chain. Trading up if you will. They sometimes see certain men as more fit. Hence her no longer seeing you as attractive.
She is just buying time until she can get setup and cut you from her life permanently. That is what this is all about. Sorry. We cannot tell from the information provided how long this has been her plan.
Did you pay for her education?
No she used student loans, Posted via Mobile Device
Re: Wife has fallen out of love after 16 years of marriage
Quote:
Originally Posted by LeMont
No she used student loans, Posted via Mobile Device
Which you are responsible for, it is marital debt, if you divorce you get half the tab. (though possibly depending on your jurisdiction it may be considered separate from the community debt if your lawyers advises). Did the loans cover just tuition, tuition+books or did it cover other living expenses? Either way, yes, you paid for her education, in large part.
She does not want to work on it anymore. So the MC said there was no point continuing. She really does not love or have attraction for me. She is really into her friends. I really need help with this transition.
Re: Wife has fallen out of love after 16 years of marriage
Quote:
Originally Posted by LeMont
She does not want to work on it anymore. So the MC said there was no point continuing. She really does not love or have attraction for me. She is really into her friends. I really need help with this transition.
Did you ask if the MC could do some IC with you to help you through this? If not then I think you should.
I'm sorry, but there isn't much you can do right now, other than take care of yourself. I'm afraid that the time apart helped her to grieve the end of your relationship, whereas now you're just starting to grieve it.
She still wants to act like nothing has happened, asked me to go to dinner with her friends yesterday as well as watch a movie with her and go to a concert in 3 months.
Re: Wife has fallen out of love after 16 years of marriage
Quote:
Originally Posted by LeMont
She still wants to act like nothing has happened, asked me to go to dinner with her friends yesterday as well as watch a movie with her and go to a concert in 3 months.
People fall in and out of love all the time. It would seem that she still wants to date you, which is a good thing. If you won her affections once you are certainly in the best position to win them again
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