romantic_guy

Early on we had many arguments. Not surprising given that we got married at 16 & 17. We celebrate 40 years this year and I think our last disagreement that could be called an argument was almost a year ago...I think.

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The marriage bed must be a place of mutuality—the husband seeking to satisfy his wife, the wife seeking to satisfy her husband. Marriage is not a place to "stand up for your rights." Marriage is a decision to serve the other, whether in bed or out. 1 Corinthians 7:2 (The Message)

Runs like Dog

Not really an argument, just a simple hitting me with her car. On purpose. Just a sideswipe though.

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canttrustu

you win!

....And what the h*ll did you expect?? The womans eyes were CLOSED!!!

kag123

We were married for about a year, life was stressful, money is tight (still is), had one small child at home with one on the way. I let him handle paying all of the bills and handling the finances, and didn't stick my nose into it. (First time in my life I ever relinquished control of finances, I supported myself for a long time before we got together so I am used to handling money and paying bills.)

I found out one day that he had just not paid some bills - for several months. I found out because I was the one who got the final collection notices in the mail. He just didn't pay them for 2-3 months straight. It was a couple of credit cards we had been paying down, and student loans. When I asked him what the heck happened, he simply said "I don't know, I forgot."

Took us almost a year to dig ourselves out of that mess. The credit cards rammed us with fees and increased our interest rates due to non-payment. The student loan people threatened to come at us for collections. Starting from that day forward I took over all of the bills and finances 100%, and only after a year did I slowly divide it up again and let him handle some of it. I had to get us to a good enough place credit score wise to be able to qualify for better interest credit cards and transfer the balances. It was a very stressful time for me.

I still dont know why he did that. He isn't one of those people who just forgets to do things, or is bad with money. He is a very responsible person and has a great credit score, has never gone into collections with anything ever. He never gave me more of an explanation other than "I forgot", and we stopped talking entirely for about a month over it because I was so angry (he nearly ruined our credit, and we had been saving up for our first house..., plus we didnt have the money to pay those bills in full at that time I got the collection notices).

I still to this day do not know what happened. I stopped digging for answers and decided to just let it go, because it was destroying my feelings for him and our marraige. Nothing close has ever happened since. I have not been that angry with him since.

cory275

biggest argument ever...

i found out my hubs' parents had set him up with an arranged marriage. he went as far as to go back to his him country and go through an egagement party wth her/them. which is what he told me was a "family trip".

the engagement was broken off a while ago.. but we still have trust/family issues.

second biggest agument??

definately emailing girls on craigslist. ew.

Runs like Dog

It's amazing what you notice when you can't find a framing hammer.

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Prodigal

Oh, the arguments; or should I say, the we-will-never-discuss-any-issues stance. My husband got angry, but his parents taught him, from an early age, that anger was BAD and an unnecessary emotion. Talk about pulling a major mind-f**k on a child ....

Our worst? Over nothing specific. He was drunk (as usual) and started talking down to me, making comments such as "gold digger" and "trailer park trash." Unfortunately, it was one of the few times I have been drunk in my life.

I am an extremely ugly drunk. Really mean. And I don't hold back. No holds barred.

I gave it back to him tit-for-tat. Even though I was pretty drunk, I remember snarling at him, "Just look at you, you little piece of sh!!. Yeah, big shot ... 'The Colonel's Son.'" (My FIL was West Point and retired after 30 years a full Colonel/Army.)

That argument was very ugly. After that, I NEVER got drunk again, and drank sparingly. But that night, in June 2006, when I erupted like Mount Helena .... that was beyond ugly.

Also put the final nail in the coffin of a dying marriage.

Plus side is I no longer engage him, even when he does his best to engage me, and doggoned if he doesn't give it his best shot about once a year.

Done. Over. Forgotten. Like I put it, "long time comin', long time gone."

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I refuse to make anyone a priority in my life who considers me nothing more than an option.

You can't start the next chapter of your life if you keep re-reading the last one.